Chatty Diaries

Sewing Project Complete

2012-01-14T20:15:00.001-07:00

I'm pleased to note that my sewing project for 2011 came to a close and I did complete even more than 12 different projects. Funny thing, though, is that I still have the main two sewing projects waiting to be started that inspired me to even have such a challenge. Maybe by 2015? The more I sew (or attempt to) the more I really really enjoy it. I just wish I had more time or knew a little more. Oh well, maybe there will be a sewing corner in the Eternities?

For a simple handmade gift this year I chose hot pads because they are a good way to use up leftover fabric. Bias tape was on my list of things to learn and so it gave me the perfect opportunity to do so. It was actually quite simple and now I want to add a little bias tape to everything. I think I will make some more for myself.

I've been wanting to make this apron forever from here and finally did it. However, when I purchased the fabric I didn't realize the entire apron was lined and so I decided to make it reversible as not to waste the cute fabric. I want to make this one again because the pattern piece for the ruffle was not the correct size to gather the way it should so the next time I will just extend it. I only wished I would have known but it turned out cute anyway and I finished it on Christmas eve at 12:30am. And I gave it to my mom.

{Santa} decided to build some beds for the American Girl Dolls floating around our house. I think he felt bad that they had nowhere to sleep. {Mrs. Claus} dusted off her machine along side the jolly man and whipped up some cute bedding for each. Thanks to the tutorials from Ana White (whom I adore and found on pinterest) Santa was able to do them quickly And this is where I make a small plug for Pinterest because I'm seriously in love with the site and wonder how I would survive without it. Do you pin Well you should!

I LOVE everything about this bed. Ava was super excited when she awoke on Christmas morning but she is quite certain that I made the bedding and Jake made the bed. She even told me that she thinks I'm Santa's helper. The random fabric choices in the quilt ended up created the perfect ensemble for a farmhouse bed. I love the stain vs paint as well.

Ellie got the bunk bed version for her two dolls and while it's hard to tell in pictures, both beds are huge. The best part is that I believe {Santa} spent about $20 on materials. Pure Awesomeness!

What a fun way to end the year. And when I'm old and wrinkly, I have proof to my children that I did, in fact, sew and it wasn't always a lost skill.

Deep Breath

2012-01-11T17:20:00.000-07:00

Ava just came up from cleaning her room with a hand written note that read,

The Dogers have 19 kids

you have 4 they

are very patient you

should be to

After sending her back downstairs to finish cleaning her room, she blurted through her tears, "Maybe you should learn how to love your children! You don't even love me!"

With that I heard the door slam, some banging around in her room and a few minutes later she marched upstairs with a suit case in hand and thin hooded sweatshirt on and declared, "I'm never coming back!"

It's been a whole five minutes and she's back down in her room. I'm thinking the sweatshirt didn't quite cut it and freezing outside didn't sound as fun. Or maybe the dramatic exit didn't go over as planned.

One things for sure:

Failing as a mother today - check!

Misty and Ryan - she says she's coming to your house to live!

Who's laughing now?

2011-12-16T09:55:00.001-07:00

I've watched this about 30 times because I'm not sure that we will ever get this little monster to laugh like this again. And yes, he's turning into a busy little monster.

Blackberry's have awful video capability but at least we captured the sound.

Play Hard

2011-12-13T21:56:00.001-07:00

Sleep hard.

Life's rough isn't it?

When Giving is All that we can do.

2011-12-06T10:02:00.002-07:00

I love this time of year because so many open hearts reach out to others that are hurting and in need. Giving is one of my favorite things about Christmas and I'm trying hard to teach my girls that it's far more rewarding to give than to receive.

Some dear friends of my two brothers are experiencing a sudden and terrible loss. Jared passed away unexpectedly and with no explanation in his sleep on November 30th. Today, his 8 month pregnant wife and 17 month old little girl will say goodbye to "daddy" and face this holiday season without him. My heart breaks for them, for his parents and siblings and for all those who will look for ways to fill a gaping hole in their heart.

Read about them here:

www.jaredjohansenlegacy.com

Help them if you can as lots of people in little ways brings miracles from heaven. Most importantly, I hope this Christmas season will be more about giving of ourselves in whatever ways we can and celebrating true giver of life and love, our Savior Jesus Christ.

Giving Thanks

2011-11-24T23:28:00.000-07:00

What a day and what a feast. Yesterday I was grateful for friends; good friends who pass the test of time and how it's effortless to pick up where we left off.

Today, I'm grateful for so much but mostly for family. As we sat around the table with bellies full and shared the things that brought us gratitude, I felt so lucky to a part of such a great family. I adore my brothers and maybe even adore their wives and children a little more.

Just the other day I was talking with my younger brother and he mentioned that when he was born (he's the 7th child) the oldest was only eight. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the thought of birthing and caring for 7 children in 8 years. And the truth is that I can't; but, I'm grateful that my mom survived, that we're still close and all kind of obsessed with being together.

Oh, and I'm super grateful that I'm NOT a black friday shopper. The thought of being around that many people makes me want to both cry and die.

More Sewing #10 & 11

2011-11-23T09:18:00.000-07:00

{Shirring}

I have had shirring tutorials bookmarked for years and countless projects-to-be-done tucked away in my overflowing brain. You see, I've decided that I'm really good and finding things I want to sew, and since I'm still a novice sewer they mostly stay filed away at things I would love to do. Shirring has been one of them. Thankfully, Carly gave me a little one-on-one lesson and I started shirring away. I'm afraid I won't stop either since it's so dang easy and I love the outcome.

Project #10 - sundresses for baby gifts. I bought the first fabric several years ago with the intention to make a sundress but just got around to getting it done. The bodice shrunk more than I anticipated so I just made it work for a smaller child.

Project #11 - well, why not some more skirts? They're super easy and make fun gifts as well.

One more to go....and I'm just getting started.

Sewing Project catch-up

2011-11-23T01:42:00.000-07:00

Well, since these photos have been sitting on my computer for months, I thought I would finally post them since my project is nearing its end.

The first on was a gift for Maggie's little friend. I made this during my sewing weekend with Carly and since I was just basing it off another dress I had, of course, I ran into a few problems. Basically I was making things too difficult for myself but in the end it turned out and I'm glad I didn't just give up and throw it out like I want to do so many times.

I've been wanting to make this skirt for a while now and unfortunately a simple project became more of a pain. I should just not attempt to make up my own version but that's how I roll. I'm glad I finished the darn thing. We ended up creating a matching headband and gave it away.

Next, I spied some clearance tanktops for $1 ea so I bought two in ea color and cut one up to add some ruffles. This is the easiest thing ever and I still plan on using the tops to the cut-up tank-tops for something else. Sadly, I'm becoming a fabric hoarder.

And I have such a poser for a child.

As soon as I saw this project here, I knew I wanted to make one and thankfully, I just became Aunty for the "I lost count" how many times and decided it would make a fun gift in a kind of return the favor kind of way. This was my "conference" weekend project and I love how it turned out. But holy moly......that's a lot of work!

I have a few more but truthfully I'm falling asleep as I type and my bed is calling my name. In fact, I'm starting to see double so things may not make much sense on here.

ps-tonight I'm grateful for bed. Really, really grateful.

Pandora

2011-11-21T23:54:00.000-07:00

day {21}

I'm grateful for music, especially Pandora, to make cleaning and house-chores more enjoyable. And my baby loves to dance with me.

Yes, I'm still thankful

2011-11-21T09:36:00.000-07:00

Sunday: I'm thankful for my sewing machine - even when the foot pedal gets stuck and the stitches keep going and going and going.

Saturday: I'm thankful for our wii fit and just giggled all day as the girls counted the calories they've burned and couldn't believe they played with it the entire day.

Friday: I'm grateful for my warm bed and heat-filled house because it's really getting cold outside.

Thursday: I'm thankful for books on tape (well, actually cd or files that can be downloaded to my ipod) because there are just too many books that I'm not willing to give up my entire life to read.

Friendships

2011-11-16T23:00:00.002-07:00

Tonight I am grateful for my firstborn and her tender heart. Amidst the girl drama that begins in the third grade, she came a month or so ago thrilled that she had met a new friend. Her friend is handicap but Ava sees their friendship as a privileged and this little girl has been a blessing in her life. Today was their first play date and I loved watching them interact and the sweet exchange between two little girls that found each other at just the right time. I think we all felt like we had an angel in our midst.

Six Mois

2011-11-15T22:45:00.001-07:00

Where or where does time go? I know it sounds so cliche but really it seems like yesterday this little dude made his entrance into this world. It's hard to believe he's only been with us six months because really I can't imagine life or our family without him. His sisters adore him and fight non-stop over holding him, sitting by him in the car, playing with him, you name it. They LOVE him to pieces.

Just in time for the six month mark - today - Ezra decided to become a big boy. Two teeth popped through and he's crawling... YIKES. I was so certain that he was going to hit each milestone later than the girls because usually that's how boys like to roll. Well, I was wrong. This boy is on the go and ready to explore.

Tidbits about Ezzy:

Darn good eater - loves rice cereal and bananas. He's not too sure about carrots and definitely lets me know he's ticked when I sneak them in between banana bites.
Still sleeping like a champ (minus the days the teeth broke through).
C r a w l i n g whether traditional or inchworm movement. By far my earliest crawler but I think it's largely because he's a tummy sleeper.
He's very determined and once he eyes a toy he wants he's sure going to get it.
Sitting unassisted and life couldn't be more exciting from such position.
Loves toys - all of them.
He can down a dum-dum sucker in record time, using his cheeks to do most of the work.
Fake coughs for attention.
Very happy baby.
Biggest flirt with the ladies - and well, everyone.
He has the biggest gummy grin - I'm actually sad that teeth are showing through.

Today I am grateful that I can look back on the last six months and feel like I have truly enjoyed this baby as much as I possibly could. He's been such a gift for all of us.

Glad to have him home

2011-11-14T22:46:00.001-07:00

Jake came home tonight after being away since Thursday for a work convention and I must say that I'm so glad he doesn't travel regularly for his job. I'm grateful to ham him here.

Summer Recap - July continued.....

2011-11-14T09:15:00.000-07:00

Cousins, blessings, birthdays, swimming oh my!

I realize it's November and 2011 is quickly coming to a close but I still have some documenting from our warmer months and the sunshine filled photos will help me survive the blasted wind that's keeping me home-bound.

Cousins:
For the second year in a row we were lucky enough to have our California beach boy spend a few days at our place. It's so much fun to see him delight is the difference between the two lifestyles and soak up our everyday moments as new adventures. I adore this handsome boy and had so many moments where I saw him as a younger version of his teenage dad.

The muscle picture below......I swear we have one exactly like that of his dad.

Just as we sent Jayden away, we celebrated our baby boy with family for his big blessing day. We had such great support on both sides of our family, lots of yummy food, and gorgeous weather. And the man of the hour, well, he was a gem and soaked up all the attention.....sleeping, of course.

My favorite photo of the day was after the company all left and my big boy scooped up his mini and relaxed together on the couch.

Sometimes I feel a little sorry for myself that all my siblings live away and many of them live by each other, but on days like this I am so appreciative of all the support we have on both sides of our giant families and realize that if we all lived close to each other it might be a bit overwhelming. That being said, I still get a little jealous of the Boise and California folks.

There, I said it.

July also brought a getaway to our condo in Eden, Utah, my absolute favorite place on earth....or one of them. Maggie enjoyed her bff, the other girls spent time with cousins and I enjoyed doing a whole lot of nothing but soaking up the beautiful scenery, good company and kissing on my boy.


(Thanks Carly for the photos)

My babe who is no longer a babe turned 4 and we did our best to make this girl feel like a million bucks. We spent the entire day at the water park in Pocatello with friends and family then managed to eat some yummy cake just in time for bed. I made this lemonade cake from Pinterest (the site I lllloooovvvvveeee) and told her all about the day she was born. Maggie is such a delightful child and being her mom is an honor.

Late Nights

2011-11-14T08:12:00.000-07:00

Sunday's gratitude spilled into Monday......1:00 am chat sessions with my sister-in-law before she moves away for winter. (Except, now that I'm older, little sleep = no fun). I'm also grateful for my brother-in-law for inspecting why the heating element in our dryer went out (Jake's been out of town) and more grateful that my dryer didn't blow up because the burned layers of lint showed signs of fire.

Do you take about your dryer and clean away the lint? I didn't but will add that to my bucket deep cleaning list after discovering what could have been. Yikes!

Simple gratitude #12

2011-11-12T22:54:00.001-07:00

Tonight I'm grateful for fixadent because my temporary crown came off and I was desperate for something to keep the darn thing glued on until the real crown arrives this week. In addition, I'm really, really grateful that I don't have dentures and fixadent is only temporary around here.

Grateful, who me?

2011-11-11T23:33:00.001-07:00

{day 11}

I'm grateful today for parents who visit and spoil us all. My only complaint is that their visits never seem to be long enough. Thanks to them, I enjoyed a late morning run outside, a super yummy lunch at my favorite local joint, fresh produce, new shoes, good conversation and movie time.

A Mormon Mother

2011-11-10T23:16:00.000-07:00

Tonight I am grateful for this woman, Annie Clark Tanner, a great-great aunt. In reading her autobiography, my mind has been opened and my heart has grown. I love her and I'm grateful for the legacy of an incredible woman who sacrificed so much and lived with so little. My favorite quote from her book today was "I sometimes wonder if people enjoy anything if they have not at sometime been denied it."

Cupcake Heaven

2011-11-09T23:00:00.002-07:00

Cocoa Bean's Red Velvet Cupcake made a welcomed surprise at this evening's church meeting. These things are so rich that I can only eat them once a year (and maybe just after giving birth). I'm pretty sure cupcakes will be a staple in heaven and for that I am grateful.

{day #9)

Lovin' Where I Live for October

2011-11-08T20:00:00.000-07:00

I've realized time and time again that what we will seek we will find. In searching for reasons to love where I live, I've found plenty and each month I seem to pocket them away to proudly declare on this little blog. While I love fall and October brings the full changing of seasons, I'm going to admit that Halloween is not my favorite holiday. Some people live for that day but I, quite frankly, live for the day after.

That being said, I'm here to state that if one is to experience Halloween in a way that it should be celebrated, then it most certainly should be done the way it is where I live. My neighborhood and the die hard Halloweenites sure do rock the holiday in a way that's not the norm.

At first, it took some getting used to that only 3 trick-or-treaters even came to our house for all the action occurs on one or two streets only. Now we leave those 3 trick-or-treaters and head for higher ground.

Here's proof of the street's popularity just as the sun is setting. All those cars do not belong to anyone that lives here. Word travels fast and everyone wants in on the action.

That action being more than begging for candy and rather a social celebration for everyone. House #1 getting ready for all the action. With a spook-alley garage and an array of food being served, there's something for everyone.

On the menu was hot chocolate, nachos with "gas station" cheese, chili, fresh scones with delicious flavored butter, sliced apples drizzled with caramel, hot dogs and warm french fries with true Idaho spuds. This is all in addition to the king sized candy bars that a few neighbors dropped in our bags.

Children swarmed the place with excitement levels that only unlimited candy can bring.

Now this is how Halloween should be.

A devil and a ballerina although two little devils would be very fitting for this duo.

So for those of you that live where I live and want to experience Halloween how it should be, then come and join our festivities for next year. Until then, I know you're jealous.

Cry - ah? As my brother Taylor would say.

Day 8 gratitude..... I'm ever so grateful for modern conveniences like heat and electricity because I'm 150% sure that I would have made an awful pioneer.

Feeling Grateful

2011-11-07T22:50:00.001-07:00

Tonight I am ever so grateful for evening running...in the dark with a star filled sky. Thank goodness for a die-hard running partner that motivates me to run when the temperature dips below 30 - and thank-you wind for blowing elsewhere tonight.

Grateful Indeed

2011-11-06T22:57:00.004-07:00

Day #6

I don't know why I don't take weekend getaways more often. Today I am grateful for family and for always have an open door, extra bed and delicious food for me and my family.

Gratitude five times

2011-11-05T22:14:00.002-06:00

Today I am grateful for two dentist brothers, three fantastic sisters-in-law and the most delicious red velvet cheesecake.

Good night indeed.

Reconnaissante....mais oui

2011-11-04T09:14:00.001-06:00

Day #4

Today I am grateful for learning apps on my ipod that entertain while educating a spongy 4 year old. And I'm grateful for empty bottles that provide endless entertainment for an almost 6 month old.

Grateful #3

2011-11-03T21:04:00.002-06:00

I'm grateful for nursing the 4th time around. Usually I'm ready to be finished at the six month mark but am not anywhere close to giving it up this time around. Plus, it sure comes in handy with a screaming, fussy baby.

I am Thankful {day #2} .....

2011-11-02T22:57:00.006-06:00

for pictures that capture memories otherwise forgotten.

This day I couldn't find Maggie ANYWHERE and just when I started to panic a bit i noticed exactly where she was hiding and why she would respond to my calls.

Je suis reconnaissante ......

2011-11-01T23:27:00.004-06:00

for countless beautiful sunsets.

Halloween 2011 - how did you guess?

2011-11-01T10:09:00.004-06:00

I'm going to admit that I'm glad Halloween is over this year. Even though Halloween fell on a Monday, someone decided to start the festivities last Friday, which I felt was a bit overkill. We could have added way more activities but opted against it this year and I'm so glad we did. This was the first year we've been able to fully participate in our neighborhood trick-or-treating and it was perfect (and part of my reason to love where I live). We are one of the few places left that does it the old-fashioned way, door-to-door. No trunk-or-treats (thank goodness) but lots of people, food, fun and candy. My only complaint, which is the same complaint I have all.the.time.......the weather. It was C O L D!

I'm glad my children are not too picky and will mostly request costumes that are already stuffed in the designated dress up chest. It sure makes life easier although one day before I die I would really like to make a costume for each of them. As for now, sewing sequin straps to a ballet outfit was the extent of my creativity.

Ezra the Caterpillar, Maggie the Ballerina, Ava the 80's Rock-star and Ellie the Witch.

What was I thinking that we could have a night without drama? Never in this household. After painting the witch's face green, she looked in the mirror with a mixture of shock and horror, bursting into tears.

Note to self: tears and green face paint do not fair well.

I begged, bribed and with all my motherly powers did my best to convince her that a green witch was going to be so cool but in the end, I gave up control and washed it all off. Then as I was curling Ava's bangs EXACTLY how I used to wear them (talk about trip down memory lane), my witch decided she would go with the green face after all. However, she was very reluctant and I knew all too well we would repeat the tears. So with Jake barking for us all to hurry it up - a common occurrence with primping girls - we opted to witch eyes and thankfully the tears stayed put. Not only two houses down and our witch, in all her excitement, tripped and fell splat on the road, skinning her knee. Luckily, daddy came to the rescue with a magic band-aide and all was well.

Our night was successful and ever so cold but like I know, it could have been worse. One year we have several inches of snow! Some things never change and upon arrival, the older girls immediately dumped out their buckets and began sorting, organizing and trading their candy. I remember all too well doing the same with my brothers growing up.

Ezra was in candy heaven and I think the best entertainment was watching him scoot, roll and turn in circles on the floor going from one exciting candy bar to the next. His entire face would light up and it was if he could barely contain all his excitement, then he would grab a candy bar and stick it right in his mouth. He quickly moved on the next one and did it over and over again.

In the end, Halloween was perfect and even more perfect now that it's over. Now we can spend November being grateful for our candy stash for the rest of the year.

Kate- A Lovely Bride

2011-10-18T10:10:00.001-06:00

My sil Kate asked me to take a few bridal pictures just prior to her fabulous September wedding. I felt honored because I don't claim to know much about photography. I just mainly like to capture my children and once in while luck out by getting a good shot. I hate when there are expectations because what if none of them turn out? I was grateful Carly decided to stick around because I knew that at least she wouldn't disappoint.

Some favorites from my lens:

Some favorites from Carly's lens:

We had a great time and the weather was perfect....September I'm telling you was divine.

Summer Recap - July.....Boise

2011-10-16T09:00:00.001-06:00

As previously mentioned, we welcomed July in Boise. We gladly traveled to warmer weather anxious to see the entire Clark family. The reason for our gathering was so unfortunate as we said goodbye to one precious little baby girl that, in the end, was too perfect for this world. This was the my girls' second experience with death, Angel Preslee had left quite and impression in their little minds. I was curious to see how they would react.

Sometimes an image speaks to the human soul and there are no words to adequately describe how such beauty and heartbreak take us beyond this life to learn and the feel what heaven only knows. I love and admire these two people - more than they'll ever know.

Sweet little Taylie, clutching tightly her blanket and holding onto her lost dream of the sister she almost had.

Angel Maree and her memory are etched in our hearts forever. I believe she made our family stronger, helping us all love each other more.

I'm pretty sure I belong to the most fantastic family on earth. Perfect? Heavens no. Do we always get along? Yea right. But you better believe that we don't mess around and know how to have a good time. Many of us agreed that this was our best family get together yet. I know it left me yearning for more and anxious for our annual August Clark vacation. Since this photo was taken, we've already welcomed one more beauty to the family with another one on the way. Good golly, I'm a lucky girl.

I love, love, love watching my brothers and the wonderful fathers they've become.

Nate and Brig

Like father, like daughter

Jon and Cleo

So tender and sweet


Taylor and Ray Some of us perfected trampoline skills, while others worked on tans. With no shortage of hands, this little man received attention a plenty.

The kids respectfully saluted their country (notice Maggie's sun face - awesome)

and stood in amazement as we enjoyed 4th of July Melba style. Why is it that the small towns just get it right?

Cleo marched along side her dad like she owned the parade. This girl doesn't mess around.

Grammie and Grandpa handed out dollar bills to all the grand-kids and sent them on their way to the Melba Fair where they enjoyed total freedom from us parents. We ate gross fair food, sent the kids on ride after ride and found refuge under Mary Poppin's umbrella.

In the end, we only wished we were as smart as her.

With endless amounts of food, swimming, good conversation, fireworks galore, nobody felt left out. However, my absolute favorite was the girls night out to Carinos. I laugh until my gut hurts with my sisters in law and really look forward to our time together. I'm a lucky lucky girl.

So lucky, that this trip was the highly anticipated moment where this little guy decided to smile (and no that's not "the smile"). I will never forget the moment and how my love quadrupled in a second.

Thank-you Boise and thank-you family for such awesome memories.

5 months and counting

2011-10-15T22:54:00.001-06:00

It's no secret that I'm a little obsessed with this little guy. I mean, really, have you wondered? I asked my mom the other day if I enjoyed all my children this much. In her opinion, you enjoy each one a little more.

I've failed to document in words details about this little guy, you know the little things that make Ezzy such a fantastic little man. So here's the recap baby boy:

You are super chill - a very easy going baby. However, when you are mad, world watch out because you don't shy away from letting everyone know. This usually only happens if you are a) hungary b) tired c) messy in the pants.
You've been a fabulous eater from the very beginning.
The first few weeks you slept best with the light on and noise. Eventually that changed but in the beginning the house went dark except for the nursery.
Your first smile was in Boise at 6 weeks old but you remained very stubborn with them for several weeks.
Now you smile at everyone all.the.time
Speaking of smiles, when you smile you little tongue always sticks out. I love it along with your gummy grin.
You did develop the worst baby acne of all four children around 6 weeks and it lasted about a month.
I still remember the first time you laughed, it was the cutest noise I've ever heard. You were 2 1/2 months old.
You loved to be swaddled, the tighter the better. We called your our little burrito. However, this all ended abruptly at 4 months old.
You rolled over first from tummy to back just over 3 months old and a few weeks later figured our back to tummy. And once you figured that out, you were instantly mobile.
You are a tummy sleeper - hence the dislike to be swaddled. It began posing a problem when you fish-like body flipped over to your belly and your arms were tied to your sides.
You were an inconsistent sleeper but once we gave you freedom and let you sleep how you wanted, nighttime is a wonder for all.
Your love the song "You Are My Sunshine" and by simply singing this tune, you ALWAYS calm down, and instantly. The look on your face reminds me of a deer in headlights. It's actually quite humorous.
You just starting sitting by yourself in time for the 5 month milestone. You do great for a few minutes then topple right over.
Ava is your second mother. She's been such a good helper and actually comes up to your room every morning right when she wakes up.
Maggie has kissed your face 9,456,321 times and your such a good sport. I, on other hand, go crazy....I mean it's a little excessive.
You are long and lean. At your last app, you were 87% for height and 25% for weight. Oh and you're all torso (thanks to mom)...hopefully you get my giraffe neck, too.
You've been a binky baby and recently it's become your favorite toy. However, in the night when the binky can't be found, you suck your fist for comfort.
Right now, you prefer mom over everyone else and just today even reached out your arms to me.
Your nicknames are Ezzy, Ezzer, Broozer, Broozie - Woozie, Bug, Buster, and Little man.
Right now you are eating rice cereal once or twice a day and breastfeeding but just enjoyed (sucked vigorously) your first bread stick tonight and loved it. You anxious to eat more.
You look a little like Maggie then a bit like Ava as a babies but then have a look of your own.
I love your dark little bushy eyebrows I have to slick into place because they can get a bit crazy. Your hair seems to be coming in darker than all three girls.
You've become mobile this last month and roll or scoot with ease wherever you want to go. I'm just praying it stays this way for a very long time!

My only wish is that I could bottle you up and keep you this age forever....well, just a little bit longer because the days are disappearing way too fast.

Summer Recap - June

2011-10-14T22:51:00.001-06:00

Updating my blog these last few months has been more like a thorn in my side, something I didn't want to do but knew I should. I go through phases here where I want to write and document the little things, but, then that very documenting becomes the last thing I want to do. It's a cycle and I just roll with it. However, as I look through my digital files, I realize that to someone other than myself they remain just a photo; but, to me they are filled with memories, sweet memories of my beautiful life.

June was a terrible month if we're talking weather, which you know isn't anything new in my little town. We had month of wind and lots of it. Everyone knows that newborn babies and wind don't do very well so we found other ways to entertain ourselves.

An impromptu photo-shoot where we captured my favorite image. The girls showered and dressed themselves and piled on Maggie's bed. Newborns are not usually cooperative for the camera so I knew there a was a sliver of time to capture my children all together. The girls were in heaven for the fifteen minutes that the little man endured their endless kisses and loves.

Ezra's three mother hens

These pictures almost make me cry because he's grown up so fast and as I look at them I remember everything about this stage. I loved how he would place his hands like that if sleep was interrupted, his beautiful olive skin and tiny little limbs.

I'm so glad we took the time to capture these moments because they are some of my favorite photos.

While we spent the entire month (and summer for some) on complete baby high, there were a few other things we managed to do. Ava had her first ballet recital and it was so much fun to watch her perform and all the nerves that lead up to it. She was a lovely ballerina and I'm so impressed with all that she's learned. She kept reminding us that we needed to bring her a bouquet of flowers and her dad, therefore, picked out the biggest one.

A good friend of mine was due a week after me and the baby finally made his debut. She didn't find out what she was having either so it's been so fun having boys that will grow up together.

The older girls spent time in Utah and Swan Valley so I could have baby and Maggie time. It was really cute how Maggie didn't want to leave my side the first month of Ezra's life. She wasn't needy at all, just wanted to be with her mom. I, of course, didn't object. She did wear a swimsuit almost everyday in deep anticipation for a warm sunny day.

Near the end of the month, we finally saw the sun and therefore, enjoyed our friend's creek swing. It's a favorite thing for all of us. Sometimes I wonder if I'm the one who loves swinging on it the most!

There we have June, the month that we will mostly savor as our newborn month with little sleep but lots and lots of love.

September made me really love where I live

2011-10-13T10:09:00.003-06:00

I still can't quite express my love for September, every last bit. I'm certain now that this is my favorite month of the year. September is the month that brings change in forms of harvest, back to school, earlier evenings, cool evening air, ending with slight hints of color that will show itself throughout October. The weather this year was near perfect, something I can't say easily where I live. The wind slept, the sun stayed, the flowers were in full bloom and for a time the world - my world - looked perfect.

Then just like that it was over, but I will be damned if we didn't enjoy every last bit of it. The first thrill began with my bebe (who is no longer the babe) making the transition to school. MMmm, I wonder if she was excited.

Which meant, I now have time to enjoy lots of this. And let me tell you, I really really enjoy him - immensely.

With the kids (well 3 of them) tucked in bed, I enjoyed a few evenings on my porch.

Labor Day weekend took us to the cabin to soak up nature and enjoy a little outdoor adventure. We enjoyed campfires, hotdog dinners and smores along with endless exploring.

We even made a new friend.

Here's proof that I was there.

Carly and Farrah came for a weekend visit. The girls were in heaven and fought endlessly over Miss F. The played in the dirt and ate ramen noodles for every meal. It was the best weekend of their lives! (Thanks Carly for the pictures)

Carly and I sewed (I did more unpicking) but the weekend was chaotically perfect. Note to self: I must stitch when all the kids are asleep. Carly did teach me a few camera tricks and we were able to both take some bridals for Katie. In the end, Maggie enjoyed her bff and insisted on doing and looking just like her.

In September, we celebrate the very day our handsome dad/man entered the world. While he's the absolute WORST person to shop for, at least we can't go wrong with his favorite chocolate/marshmallow cake.

September also brought a beautiful outdoor wedding on the ranch. Kate made a lovely bride and we all thoroughly enjoyed ourselves.

While Maggie soaked up attention from the older kids around,

the other two were enamored with their own bouquets.

Their "Clark" cousins came and life couldn't be better. Since they don't have any cousins their age on Jake's side, they often ask if any "Clark" cousins will be there. (I think we're at 26 on my side).

My dad says I'm dressing Ezra in clothing too old for his age, but I argue that next to the actual wedding, his "wedding attire" was the highlight of the day (for a few of us at least).

Ava rescued a cat that was being chased by the neighbor's dogs and now we have added "Boots" to our household. He stays outside and I still hate cats, although he's good entertainment for my girls.

There's nothing like adding an impromptu race to make an already fantastic month. Jake and I, along with 6 other friends ran the Temple to Temple relay-a 37 mile course.

There you see, September was fabulous in every single way, and I really loved every single day.

(photo by Carly)

At least I'm not alone on that one.

I Would Blog but....

2011-10-08T22:25:00.000-06:00

I'm trying to soak up every single moment with this little guy
because he's decided to grow up way too fast

For Stacey....

2011-09-19T22:33:00.000-06:00

Because this hat might be the favorite thing he owns.

Ezzy 4 months old

Two Reasons to Love Where I Live

2011-09-14T23:19:00.002-06:00

Sometimes I don't know what this blog is for. I mean, I document life and I like to but sometimes I don't document at all even though I want to. Then I feel guilty for not documenting and even more guilty if I don't want to. Then I look at all my pictures - like from summer, par exemple, and realize that non-documentation would be a shame for my posterity at most.

So to continue with part one of my challenge for 2011, let me document how and why July and August helped me love where I live.

I love the river, the Snake River that runs through town. My all-time favorite run is the greenbelt that runs along the river. It's beautiful and often filled with other exercise enthusiasts or just people that like to enjoy the outdoors.

The falls are the hot attraction for both locals and out-of-towners. This year they were raging all summer long. I love how the temple is position directly behind the falls creating a beautiful picture anytime of year.

During the summer, the river houses art festivals, the ever famous fire work show, entertainment for children, free concerts and just about the coolest atmosphere for our small little town. We just happened to be present for the Belly Dancers.....Idaho style.

Meet Wanda and Mindy (their names for real). They shook those hips, flaunted their bellies and left two little girls enamored. Not only can one find such fabulous entertainment but just in case you need ideas for new hairstyles, there are plenty of shirtless 10 year olds sporting latest trends. And as if Wanda and Mindy were not enough, they brought out their entire crowd and shook it Idaho Style.

Like I said, they were quite entertained.

August this year brought raspberries and I could spend days in a raspberry patch. Not only are they the most delicious fruit - freshly picked - but the raspberry patch at the ranch is divine. This year the raspberries were beautiful and there were plenty to go around. We enjoyed fresh raspberry rhubarb pie, raspberry shakes, raspberries on everything and plenty of raspberry jam.

For an extra added bonus, a mommy bird decided to make her home in the middle of the patch and we just happened to be there while the babies were still teeny tiny.

The River and Raspberries - two things that not only made me smile but made me really happy to be living where I do.

Sewing Project Catch Up

2011-08-30T09:39:00.002-06:00

I've been sewing again and I realize again how much I love it. I just wish I knew what I was doing a little better. There are still two more projects until I'm completely caught up but I'm making progress.

This apron didn't turnout how I wanted it to and I think it's because the bottom material was too thin. The top part was an old shirt from Downeast that I cut apart.

Last year I bought two skirts like this from a local boutique for the girls. They didn't have one in Maggie's size so I just purchased the fabric with the goal to figure out how to make it on my own. Paige and I decided to have sewing night at our family reunion in August and I finally tackled the project.

This skirt was a re-fashion from an old shade shirt. The lace was from an old Downeast tank-top that I took apart. Can I say that jersey knit is a pain? It was my first time sewing on this stretchy fabric and I almost ripped it in half. Good thing I have some cute little nieces with birthdays this time of year. The best part about this skirt is that it didn't cost me a thing.

When I was making Maggie's skirt above, My sil asked if I would make one for her little girl and so I did.

Sewing, I have found, is very therapeutic. I'm hoping to attempt elastic thread soon. Wish me luck.

ps- Carly.....would you hurry up and get here?

The Ever Appropriate First Day of School Post

2011-08-29T08:24:00.000-06:00

I just sent the girls off to school and I'm feeling a little sad about it all. I mean, I value education and all but just wasn't ready for summer to end. I told Ava the other day that I didn't want them to leave and be in school all day to which she replied, "Why mom, you just always want to send us to our room for quiet time anyway."

They are both in school all day and get on the bus bright and early, during the cold winter months, way before the sun comes up. Maggie is starting her pre-school on Thursday and will leave even earlier. She's a peer model for the district pre-school which means it's FREE, they bus her both ways, and it's 4 days a week. She's really excited.

I looks like Ezzy and I will have mornings to ourselves. I'm looking forward to the schedule and structure even though I love to throw that all out the window for summer.

Oh and I have SO much catching up on this blog to do. September may be my favorite month living where I do, I've been sewing and we did have a lot of fun these last few months.

Baby Ezra takes Chicago

2011-08-25T00:14:00.000-06:00

Jake was due in Chicago Monday morning for a business convention and we decided it seemed like a good opportunity to take our little man on his first big adventure. Oh and to celebrate 11 years of marriage....yup ELEVEN years! We farmed out the girls and hopped on the first plane out of town. We even went a few days early to be sure we had ample time to explore the splendid city.

And Splendid it was.

We loved Chicago but I dare say the little man may have loved it more. Here he is enjoying his first gourmet breakfast hotel style. It was a toss up between the fruit and yogurt parfait and the scrumptious french toast.

Following breakfast, he insisted on heading with the rest of the city to Navy Pier. The Air and Water Show was expected to begin but ended up being postponed completely. I guess there are other places in the world with unpredictable and uncooperative weather. Thankfully, the rain reminded him of his noise maker and he fell fast asleep.

We then hitched a ride with the Callister clan and detoured right to the American Girl Place. There were enough little girls with dolls in hands that we felt bad for our little man and quickly picked him out a doll of his own. His father wouldn't go for it so we left the brown-haired little dude where he belonged but isn't he cute?

After some Chicago stuffed pizza at Giordanos, he begged for a photo in the cloud gate at Millennium Park (Jake calls it the bean). It was Saturday and very very busy. By this time, the clouds had parted and the sun was out.

He followed the trail of children to the Crown Fountain and was just heartbroken that we wouldn't allow him to splash in the water. He just doesn't understand that 2 inches of bath water is about all he can handle right now.

Sadly, we had to send off our friends and head back to the hotel but Ezzy didn't mind because he loved the view from our room.

His crib, on the other hand, well he hadn't seen something so fancy before. I guess what I meant to say is that I haven't seen a crib in a hotel like this for years. I especially appreciate the big warnings posted on the side-rails about death and suffocation.

I'm glad he didn't seem to mind.

Should you ever visit Chicago, you MUST eat at Yolk for breakfast but weekends will have you waiting for an hour unless your hotel sends with priority seating. Thank-You! Ezzy loved it so much we went back for takeout the next day.

Another Chicago must is the River Architectural Tour but pray for good weather and it helps to have the air show flying above. The others on board, and everyone for that matter, commented on how well-behaved our baby was.

When the little man wasn't charming everyone we passed and sneaking flirty grins to all the ladies, he was doing a little of this. He may be a mama's boy but he really loves his dad.

It's concluded that the Pier is better on a sunny day and post Airshow when the crowd is heading the other way.

Like the rest of the male tourists, Ezzy wanted to see Marilyn and then insisted for a closer look.....or maybe that was really his dad.

The river walkway outside our hotel was a favorite for sure.

And the park at night provides a different sort of view.

Those Buckingham fountains were pretty fantastic as well.

And just when the fountains couldn't be any more spectacular, we passed by the ones we visited in the light. Ezra insisted for another stop and this time preferred to stay put.

Ezzy loved Chicago and so did we. Maybe it was the adventure and having us all to himself with no mother hens in his face but he slept all night long the four nights we were there and when he did make a peep, it was his city that quickly took the tears away.

While a big city has its perks, in the end we are mountain air folks where the only lights in the dark night sky are the ones that God intended. It's always good to come home.

Pictures

2011-08-01T19:04:00.000-06:00

are there to remind us how much we love them.......
even when they revert back to the newborn sleepless nights.

And I don't know about you but when my children are sleeping my heart swells and I think I love them even more.

June made me really love my home and neighbors

2011-07-29T20:37:00.007-06:00

June was a dreadful month weather wise where I live. It was cold and rainy and when it wasn't it was very very windy. Honestly, I almost cried because I hated where I lived. In fact, I think I did one day but that was partly due to unfortunate news and postpartum hormones. But, THE WIND - it was awful. Newborns and wind don't do well so we spent most of our time in our house and I will tell you that I really really love my home.

Along with my home, I love my neighborhood. I was overwhelmed by the goodness and gifts sent our way to celebrate our little boy. Having a baby is better than Christmas and being the recipient of others' kindness left me humbled and often speechless. There are so many good people in this world and we are fortunate to live amongst the best.

Blow all you want wind (well not really but like you listen to me anyway) because we have shelter from you and it's shelter that we love.

To Fall in Love Again

2011-07-27T20:02:00.003-06:00

A friend recently wrote on my facebook wall, "Congratulations on falling in love all over again."

Suddenly, I got it....the difference this time around. Surely I fell fast and hard for all of my children but there was something different with this baby, something new, something I didn't understand.

He's my little Ezzy that will someday become a man and oh I hope he becomes a great one. He's a miniature of the one I married and I see it everyday. I'm reminded of those feelings that lifted me high into the clouds so many years ago.

Like before, I thrive on his complete attention and he consumes my thoughts. His smiles make my knees all wobbly and my heart beats a little faster. So often I neglect my daily responsibilities to just be in his presence and hold him close, realizing that my life is perfectly complete. Each night I thank the heavens for sending him my way and in the morning do it all over again in case no one was listening.

Right now he depends on me for life and I depend on him. After all, he is his father's son.

Sure enough I'm smitten all over again.

Who can blame me anyway?

Magalicious

2011-07-21T00:01:00.014-06:00

It was Thanksgiving Day 2006 and I woke up feeling a little sick, a sick that became more evident with each passing hour. I had a strange rash resembling shingles, pain in my spine and aches everywhere. I spent most of my time on the couch as a worthless mother to two.

The following day I decided a visit to the doctor was necessary (shingles you see) and Urgent Care was my only option. The doctor took x-rays, took blood, ran tests, asked questions and examined the rash. At one point (before x-rays) he asked if I there was a chance I was pregnant. "Oh, no way. I'm positive," I responded assuring him a pregnancy test would be a waste of time, resources and money. He insisted just to be safe.

Shingles - yes, pregnant - double yes because I made them test it twice. I can still picture the smirk on the doctor's face as he entered the room, plopped on his doctor chair and said, "Well, it looks like you're pregnant!" In complete shock, disbelief and on the verge of a royal meltdown, I exclaimed, "What? There's no way. How did this happen?"

My favorite was doctor smirk's reply, "Do I REALLY need to explain that one to you?"

I left the office with a prescription in hand and filled with disbelief. A text from Jake came in asking how the doctor went so I replied with a one letter word starting with P and ending in T.

I wasn't ready for baby #3 and thought it would be the worst thing for me, for us. I had a plan and a baby was not part of my plan. Four years and nine months later I'm certain that I knew nothing then and am grateful that someone else did and cared enough to let my stubborn self know.

Maggie made her surprise appearance on a hot summer day - July 21st - just four years ago. She was 2 1/2 weeks early, completely bald with very little resemblance to her sisters. She reminded me of a little bird - a little bald bird that has now stretched, grown some blond hair and developed the most loving personality a child could own.

Maggie has been a delightful child and I can only be honored to be the one she calls mother. She loves and loves big. Her little arms will wrap around a strangers legs, she will smother kisses on people she barely knows their names and "I love you's" will ring in everyone's ears. Sometimes her love can be overwhelming and I've found myself guilty in pleading for the daily kisses to stop at a hundred.

My Maggie is full of life, full of adventure and I'm happy to lead her by the hand then stand by her side as she experiences and lives this life. She's been a gift when I thought I needed something else, a blessing that I never dreamed of and surprise when I least expected.

I adore her completely.

Happy Birthday Maggie Moo!

Making me smile

2011-07-15T23:46:00.003-06:00

My boy (pinch me still) turned 2 months old today.
He's no longer stingy with his smiles.
I didn't think I could love him more than I already do.
But today I do.

Angel Maree Rose

2011-07-13T12:53:00.001-06:00

Last weekend my entire family traveled to Boise to show love and support for my older brother and his sweet family as they buried their little baby girl. Holding my perfect little man and standing infront of a tiny casket brought mixed emotions that not even I can fully understand.

This life is hard.....sometimes so very hard; but, once again I'm reminded of the importance of family and the wonderful family I have. My very favorite picture from the weekend was taken by my darling sil, Paige. There's something magical that she captured - something heavenly and beautiful.

The grand kids releasing pink balloons into the heavens for baby Maree.

Paige summed it up perfectly in pictures and words.

You can read about it here and here.

Alive.....barely

2011-07-12T17:05:00.002-06:00

4 children is just about as much as I can handle, if I can even call it that. Between nursing the babe and trying to shew away his three mother flies that just don't know when enough is enough, managing the fights between the older ones, keeping up a clean house, traveling, resuming all wifely/motherly duties, and trying to find a spare moment to exercise or anything just for me............I'm kinda turning crazy.

Cooky is a better word.

But, the sun finally came out and unfortunately the wind stayed around to hangout, too. I can handle the wind (kind of) when the sun is out.

I'm happy to report Maggie is afraid of a fly, a teeny tiny little fly. She won't go anywhere near them because she thinks they will suck her blood. Her sisters planted that one in her brain.

Poor little Ezzy is on stimulation overload and has developed the lovely case of baby acne (probably from all the rough, slobbery kisses his sisters smother him with hourly). He's growing too fast and smiles mostly just for me. At least I get something for turning into a human milk cow.

As for the older girls, Ava just came up to me and asked, "Mom, how come you and Ellie said you hated me and wanted to sell me to another family?"

Um, pretty sure I never said that so I called for the little horse to get it straight from her mouth.

Ellie's response, "Remember when you said that......when I was five?"

Me: nope

Ellie: "Well, maybe I was four."

Me: "Four huh? You must have a good memory."

Ellie: (As I'm walking away she looks at Ava) "I guess it was just in a dream."

If I ever find my sanity, I will let you know.

May really helped me to Love Where I Live

2011-06-10T11:24:00.002-06:00

May was our miracle month as we finally met our little guy that we were certain was a girl. There were so many little things that made this event wonderful and perfect in every way and they all happen to be because I live where I do. First and foremost, I must say that I have the BEST baby (OBGYN) doctor in the world. Hands down, I'm not lying. Jake used to tell people that I had a crush on my doctor because I couldn't stop boasting about how wonderful he was/is. But it's true, he really is that good and I feel bad for anyone that doesn't know how cool doctors, especially the OBG-ones, can really be.

However, I will admit that we were thoroughly spoiled when Maggie was born because he was new to the area and we were amongst his first patients. This time around was a little different because apparently I'm not his only number one fan which meant I didn't even see him until 28 weeks because he was always delivering babies....the nerve! Minus the few bumps along the way, he didn't disappoint and I think I love him even more (in a very patient/doctor kind of way).

I love that he has let Jake deliver our last two children - full on deliver. I thought it was funny this time around when I declined the pain meds and the first round of Ibprofen, the nurse sternly said, "Well, then you let Dr. L know you declined because we are on strict orders to give it to all his patients." Yup, he's very particular with his patients and the nurses know it. I like that.

Dr L.....you're pretty awesome and I kinda like you.


Sure glad I had pretty toes!

I think everyone should have a friend like I do, probably the best labor and delivery nurse on earth. I've never been so well cared for. I really owe it to her for making my natural birthing experience so enjoyable.

We have two hospitals in town that are right across the street from each other which is a long story with a lot of drama and history that I don't care to visit in this post. In the past, I've always chosen the bigger hospital since they have a better NICU for the "just in case" moments. This time around I went the other route and I have zero complaints.

Last but not least, I have a good friend, Tiffany, who took some pictures of our little babe that I adore. There are so many that I love. I've never really done newborn pictures with my other kids but am so glad I did this time around. It's a job working with those little ones that just don't want to cooperate yet so worth it in the end.

Thank-you May for giving me so many reasons to really LOVE where I live.

Still on baby high.....

2011-06-04T11:39:00.004-06:00

we all are.

A Birth Story {Ezra James}

2011-05-23T17:06:00.005-06:00

The blog post I've been wanting to write for the last nine months and now I never want to forget anything about this day.

It's true.

After three girls,we have a little boy and it was the the best surprise in the world.

In the early days of pregnancy #4, we both agreed not to find out the sex of the baby and that we would enjoy 9 months anticipating the unknown. Now that it's over, that was the single best decision we ever made. Also, in the early months as I was mapping out my pregnancy weeks on my calendar, I happened to type in on May 15 "Gonna have a baby." Coincidence or not? Who knows.

In the wee hours Sunday May 15th, I couldn't sleep since regular contractions made themselves known. I was curious if they would amount to anything or simply disappear like that had so many times before. While the girls were at grandma's for the weekend and Jake snoozed, I decided to clean my already spotless house in hopes that the contractions would become strong enough to send me into active labor. I gave up around 3 am and went to bed. That morning we went for a long walk along the greenbelt and they returned. Around 2pm, I had decided it was time to make our way to the hospital to see if they were doing anything. After all, just a few days prior I was dilated to a 4 and 80% effaced and from prior experience, being a 9 and 100% effaced didn't feel much different.

We checked into the hospital and learned I was now dilated to a 5. Protocol is to monitor contractions for an hour then check for any changes. After the first hour, there was no change so I was ordered to walk the halls for 30 minutes and check again. Still a 5 and no change. The doctor on call was not comfortable sending me home since I was at a 5 and this was my 4th baby so I was told to stay a little longer and see if "true labor" would kick in. Dr. L (my doctor) had told me to call him if I ended up in labor over the weekend so we began a series of text messaging. Because, after all, who calls anymore these days?

After a few minutes, Jake handed me his phone with the following text:

"I'm coming up to break your water in 30 minutes.  Happy Birthday!"

I was elated; but, as quickly as the excitement entered, we received another text message stating the nursery didn't want him to come break my water because the baby was still 2 weeks early and they were at capacity in the NICU. So for the next hour and half we sat in limbo wondering our fate. In that time, my contractions grew stronger and harder. Finally, after the said half-an-hour-turned-hour-and-half, Dr. L showed up and informed me that I was now a 7 and there was no way he was sending me home. It was around 7pm that he broke my water, always a strange sensation, and we were really on our way to having this baby - on May 15th.

I had opted not to have an epidural this time and was fortunate to have a wonderful nurse with a few tricks up her sleeve to help ease the pain, tricks that worked wonders. She prepped me for the worst as she described the "transition" phase explaining that I would probably vomit and scream and transform into another human being that I never knew existed. At one point I said out loud, "Maybe I want an epidural after all." The reason I chose not to get the epidural wasn't because I wanted the "natural" experience or needed to prove my womanhood but simply because my insurance didn't cover it and I didn't want to pay for it. I usually labor pretty quickly and figured I could do it. At least I hoped I could.

For the next hour, my contractions slowed way down. With my nurse, I climbed stairs and walked the halls but they were still pretty weak so I asked for Pitocin, knowing it would make things a little more uncomfortable but anything to speed things up. I am believer in more pain for a shorter amount of time and not the other way around. Sure enough the Pit worked and within an hour I was ready for the final stage. Thankfully, I was still myself: no vomiting, no screaming and no crazy lady had emerged.

All smiles until the pain sets in.

What happened next was nothing short of an out-of-body experience with a limited vocabulary to convey just how incredibly intense those moments were and how the minutes seemed like forever. One thing I know now more than ever is that the human body was designed to endure pain, deep physical pain and the human mind was designed to overcome that physical pain. With every birth, I'm always amazed how efficient each participant fulfills their duty and how it's a perfectly choreographed art: table unfolded, stirrups up, bright overhead light on aimed where the sun doesn't shine, side tables set-up with said tools, scrubs out, gloves one, nursery station in place and so forth.

Just as I promised I wouldn't scream but warned I very well may say a few explicit words, I felt a contraction coming on and let it be known. On cue, I pushed and pushed hard while the nurse counted to ten like I've seen in so many birth videos. I gasped for air then pushed again and it was here that I entered another world. I think all the languages in the world cannot adequately describe the feeling, the pain, the intense surrealism of bearing this child. I just remember the doctor's order, the nurse's voice and all the voices of encouragement and praise. And then as quickly as it all began it stopped and I had a moment to breath.

"The uterus gave up, Dr. L said so we'll wait for the next one."

As much as I needed the break, I now knew what I was in for and there was no turning back. The next minute was the shortest minute of my life and the minute that followed felt like a hundred. As my body tensed up with the onset of contraction #2, I mentally went to my happy place (wherever that is I don't know) and with all the energy in me pushed my baby out.

The "ring of fire" is what they call it when the baby's head crowns and it was in that moment that I thought I might die. It was that moment that I thought I couldn't do it anymore. With my eyes clenched tight and every muscle working towards ridding my body of this pain, I saw lights and heard noises yet I heard and saw nothing at all, just felt my body splitting in two. And just when I was certain I couldn't do it anymore, I heard the doctor announce one more push and we have a baby. So I pushed with energy I thought was no longer there and the pain was gone, instantly gone and a baby was born.

I never knew a few minutes could leave the human body and spirit so exhausted and overwhelmed and little did I realize there was more to come. I opened my eyes and looked around at all the smiling faces, the voices praising and exclaiming victory and then I looked in front of me and saw my baby, thankful for the loud screaming and pink flesh that appeared before my eyes. I heard Jake declare in his proudest father voice, "IT'S A BOY!!!!" My eyes darted down the vernix covered flesh to confirm what I just heard. I couldn't believe it. I didn't believe it but it was true, our baby is a BOY!

Capturing the moment he learned it was a boy!

A mixture of emotions.

Soothing my new babe.

There was enough cheering to fill a crowded stadium and smiles were everywhere. Immediately, the baby boy, my baby boy, was placed on my chest and my emotions were instantly compounded. Just moments before I thought this baby was killing me and now he was here, healthy and beautiful. As he cried, I cried and naturally began to console him. He quickly calmed down at the sound of my voice and through my touch. I really am this baby's mother, I thought to myself.

And this baby is a BOY!

Our first moments together.

I love the birthing process, everything about it. I love the anticipation, the unexpected and unknown. I love the smells, the sounds, the emotions and the adrenaline. In a twisted way, I love the pain because when it's gone it's the last thing I remember. I love the hospital and everything about it. I love the quiet moments alone with a baby new to this world, the moments where souls communicate and two worlds collide. I love that my body was made for bearing children and that all my birthing experiences have been borderline perfect, this one being perfection alone. Most of all, I love that a new pink-fleshed squirmy being helps me forget all the discomforts from the previous nine months and makes me want to have a hundred more.

Ezzy with his three mother hens.

1 day old

It's now a week later and I'm more in love than I ever thought I could be. As I think back on that day, I realize again and again how close heaven and earth really are and the beautiful miracle we call birth. I wouldn't change anything about this day and would gladly do it all over again.

One week old

I only imagined life could be so sweet.

It's a BOY!

2011-05-16T12:22:00.001-06:00

Ezra James Lundquist

May 15, 2011

10:16 pm

7 lbs. 6 oz.

21 inches long

For Journaling Purposes

2011-05-08T12:05:00.000-06:00

Some tidbits about pregnancy #4:

I was the most sick with this baby, especially the first 5 months.
Orange anything made run to the bathroom and puke.
I never knew you could get gas pains in your ribs and heart.
So far I've gained just about the same amount of weight as the other three....a whopping 5 lbs:) {joke}
I've had the worst back pain and sometimes feel like I'm eighty.
I don't think I had any major cravings that I can remember.
I exercised until I felt like my bones were splitting apart....just not worth it at that point.
I've measured 1 week small until the last month when I measured right on.
This baby is by far the most active baby.....not sure if it ever sleeps.
The baby loves to stick out it's rear on my left side and poke the feet right under my right ribs....completely sideways.
Heartbeat has been consistently in the 140's or lower.
I've been nesting for months but it goes in spurts.
We still don't know the sex of the baby.
I love baths more than ever.
Heartburn this time around has been unreal. I feel like my throat is on fire most of the time especially with tomato based food. Thank-goodness for tums.
I failed my first glucose test but luckily passed the second.
Being pregnant in the 30's is a whole lot harder.
The last two weeks of this pregnancy I had incredible energy and should have hired out my cleaning services.
I bought a few girl items in hopes that it would jinx us into having a boy.
At 35 weeks I was dilated to a 2 and 80% effaced and was certain the baby would come early.
Early on in the pregnancy, I mapped out my weeks and decided that May 15th was a good day to have a baby.
It have chosen to labor sans epidural but only because I don't want to pay for it.

My Bad Mom Day

2011-04-23T19:37:00.002-06:00

FACT: 6 year olds LOVE to do their own hair and insist on doing so daily.

Last night I left the girls with dad and went out for a hot night on the town which really means I went to dinner and talked for hours with two of my favorite people. I don't do that often enough and I'm glad to know that I still enjoy time to myself. However, when I arrived home more than four hours later, I received a scolding from that dad for hurting my 6 year old's feelings earlier that day.

FACT: Sometimes and probably more often than I like to admit, I'm a bad, bad mom.

Earlier in the day, Ellie hopped out of tub on cue, dressed herself then spent some lengthy time in her bathroom. Finally, she proudly marched into my bedroom and asked me how I liked her hair. Her hair was wet and slicked with a part down the middle, each half pulled into elastics then with her fingers she had made a wet, hair-sprayed ringlet in each piggy and carefully adorned each with a bright red bow. She was so proud and I smiled and told her what a nice job she did. Then I made the mistake of asking if I could fix the pigtails and include the pieces that didn't quite make it into the elastics.

She wasn't having it.

The day before she had once again slicked her hair down with a middle part and with her fingers flipped the ends up then took a small chunk on top of her head and with an elastic gave it a sort of unicorn look. Some days she will do the same with one random pigtail right above her ear. Sometimes I let her go to school because I don't want the battle but most of the time I convince her to let me fix or refine her do because I don't want her to get teased by the other kids.

Yesterday I did the latter when I should of just let her go.

Jake informed me that she drew a picture of her hair and carefully explained exactly how it looked but then concluded with, "but mom didn't like it and thought it looked funny so she re did it herself." Part of me giggled as I remembered the morning then another part of me felt terrible for crushing her confidence and failing to just let her be.

FACT: Sometimes I have a hard time letting my little ones just be.

Hair is not that big of a deal and more often than I like to admit my girls look like Orphan Annie's with stringy hair. However, I believe in individuality and if it means my girls will do their own hair or each-others' hair than I'm going to do my best to give up control and just let them find that person they want to be.

FACT: I have a hard time giving up control.

Hence, the word TRY.

Island Park, Idaho

2011-04-21T22:41:00.006-06:00

April's reason to LOVE where I live

To welcome spring and the beginning of April, we spent a week practically buried in the snow - lot's of snow.  Of course, we didn't mind one bit because Island Park has quickly become one of our favorite places on earth.  There are so many things that I love about this place but two words sum it up perfectly; simplicity and beauty.  Life at the cabin nestled in the woods is easy, gorgeous and simple.

I love that we can drive a short distance and completely escape from the real world.  With barely cell phone coverage, no television or internet, we are forced to enjoy the world around us and doing things with each other.  I love the peaceful calmness and feeling as though we are the only ones around.  I love sitting around and watching the fire, the real fire that we have to restock wood to keep burning.   I love its warmth and feeling.  In the summer, I love the bonfires outside, roasting marshmallows, hot dogs and tinfoil dinners. 

Winter in Island Park has an unreal beauty with the ability to replenish the mind, body and soul.  It's difficult to describe and one must experience the place themselves to understand.  The snow this year was unreal, more snow than I've ever seen in one place at one time.   

One of my favorite activities is to snowshoe in the acres of National Forest behind our place.  The sun was out, the coats were off and in the days we were there, the snow shrunk tremendously.  In fact, we thought we may not be able to even get out through the slush filled roads.  

(As if I'm not already tall enough....thanks sunshine for the Jolley Green Giant Shot) 

One of my favorite things, though is that the girls LOVE it just as much

(if no more) than I do.

They play endlessly just how children should play.  

We've been able to create so many fun family memories in Island Park that we will cherish a lifetime.  Our old-fashioned Christmas was special in its own right and I will always consider Island Park as one of God's corners of the earth.

Photoshoot

2011-04-21T09:56:00.001-06:00

Before I know it, my hands will be full with one more little one and as excited as we all are for that to arrive, there are a few things that I really want to do. One of them was a one last getaway to Utah because who knows when I will dare do that with four children to pack for and watch after without Jake by my side.

While we we were there, we were fortunate to meet Justin Hackworth and have our first mother/daughter/grandmother/maternity photoshoot. I love Justin's style and was really excited to see his work in action. First off, his office is dreamy - on the corner of Center and University in an older historic building with the most amazing base trim ever. (Can't you see how high it is?) Truthfully, I've always been a little scared of Provo and don't think I've been there more than a few times since my courting days with Jake. However, I now want to go back and explore the shops/restaurants and life outside of BYU, not to mention those mountains that have always fascinated me.

Upon arrival, we were greeted with a personalized sign on the last flight of stairs to the second floor, an extra special touch. Seated on a lovely light blue couch, we all took turns answering questions and getting to know the photographer a little better. My favorite was when Justin asked Maggie how old she was and she responded, "I like to dance and sing," (the second question he had asked the other girls). She kept asking when it was "her" turn and even proudly performed her twirls, retirés and arabesques.

For the next hour, we were subject to a camera inches from our face and being placed in various positions and groups at different angles and heights. We're still waiting to view all of our proofs but were able to see a sneak peak on his blog. It was such a memorable experience to be with my girls and my mother and to be part of such a worthy cause.

30 Strangers

2011-04-12T08:31:00.001-06:00

Have you heard of Justin Hackworth

seen his amazing work?

I'm loading up the girls and heading for Utah this weekend to be part of his annual 30 Strangers Project.
The focus is mothers and daughters and I'm really excited to not only meet Justin but to see his work in action.
I'm also hoping he'll work some magic on my 8 month blooming bun!

Here are some images from years past:

(Ironically, I went to college with the girl in the top middle - don't remember her name but haven't forgotten that face).

Check out some of his photos from this year's project here.

And pretty sure I can thank her for being selected.

A Slice of Heaven Where I Live

2011-03-29T05:42:00.003-06:00

I love the Temple.
I live 5 minutes from this beautiful place.
I get to go often, drive by multiple times a week and sometimes even several times a day.
On the bleakest of days, I love seeing this white edifice reaching towards the heavens.
I love the blessings the temple brings, the peace it holds and the power within.

I have always wanted to take pictures of "my" temple but haven't until this month. Even then, it was on the way home from dance and I quickly pulled over, left the girls in the car and literally snapped a few shots. I set my camera to black and white setting and left the photos "as is." Sometimes the unedited version is beautiful in its own right.

Reason #3 to love where I live - the house of the Lord.

Yearly Challenge part deux....finally

2011-03-28T10:06:00.000-06:00

Today's the first day of spring break for my girls and after a few wind-howling, nippy days, we woke up to three inches of fresh snow. My oldest exclaimed, "What a great first day of spring!" (She was totally serious and beyond excited). It's all in perspective I thought so what a great day it is!

With that said, I'm finally getting around to finishing and posting the second half to my yearly challenge. While I focus on finding things around me that I love in hopes to swell with pride for my hometown, I also want to stretch myself creatively and hopefully develop some mad sewing skills. Truth is I love to sew. I could scour sewing books and sewing blogs for hours, dreaming up all the possibilities. There's only one problem, I really suck at the skill. I'm self-taught at everything I know and I suppose that explains a lot. I'm not good with patterns or following instructions but sometimes I can fake it 'til I make it. A girl doesn't have to stop trying (or dreaming in my case).

I've decided that for each month in 2011 that I will complete one of the bazillion projects I have swimming around in my head or sitting next to my Bernina. By 2012, I will have at least 12 completed projects from the previous year and hope that I will have learned a thing or two.

My first project was a rather simple concept but one that I didn't know how to do and needed to sit down and figure out - button holes. Thankfully, I have a wonderful machine that, with a push of the button, does most of the thinking for me. I've been needing to sew buttons and make button holes for Ava's duvet cover for forever now and after 20 million promises that I will get it done, I just did it.

And guess what? It wasn't hard at all. Now, I want to sew buttons on everything. This really makes keeping her duvet in one place so much easier. Plus, it also adds a little bling to her bed. Project #1 = DONE!

Project #2 was also for her room and I believe I've had this project since last May?? I fell in love with Amy Butlers gumdrop pillows while browsing a favorite fabric shop in Utah. I've had the pieces cut and pinned together forever and finally took the time to sew them all together. Thanks to Youtube, I also learned how to do a slipstich to close both side openings once the stuffing was completed.

Which brings me to the one downfall to this project. It takes a whole heck-of-a-lot of stuffing. The directions say to use 10-12oz bags of nature-fil and my goodness, each bag is about $12. I got creative and cut up some old pillows that were going to make their way to garbage anyway and I ended up having the perfect amount. I love how it turned out and now there's a darling little ottoman with its own little spot in Ava's room. (I swear one day that room will be 100% complete).

Now, I'm obsessed and sewing like a mad woman. I have bags of old clothes to recycle and will be posting my apron recycled from an old eyelet shirt after I finish some final tweaking.

One of my favorite sewing blogs right now found here.
I want to make this, this, this and this.

It's all about Dimes

2011-03-24T15:31:00.002-06:00

I will admit, I've haven't been very consistent or successful with a method to help an 8 yr old, 6 yr old and 3 1/2 yr old learn to work and be accountable for their behavior - both good and bad. For so long, I've brushed it off because I assumed they were too little and sometimes I have a hard time letting them do some of the chores in the house. I can be a little OCD sometimes with house the toilets are scrubbed, the beds are made, the dishwasher loaded, etc... But, I have learned to roll with it and and accept the bed made slightly less than perfection and someone else to take pride in scrubbing the toilet bowls or pushing the vacuum.

In the past, I have made feeble attempts at job charts, only to forget about them after a week. I don't know if it's that I get lazy or just tired (probably both) of the constant battle over getting a simple 5 minute task done. And don't get me started on the arguing. Oh wait, my children would never argue - never.

Just a few weeks ago, my two oldest children displayed a Jekyll/Hyde moment that I have never seen before and I can only fear that it's the first of many, many more to come. I don't even remember what set them off but they both completely lost their cool. It was almost as if and evil beast took hold of their sweetness, infusing everything sour and rotten within sight all at the same time and with more force than humanly possible. I swear their eyes turned red and a demon other than the beings I birthed took hold and what happened next left me in a blur. There was kicking and screaming and yelling and door slamming and for a moment I had flashbacks to my adolescent years while fearing my future - the teenage years that seem to be creeping in early and payback from so long ago.

I ordered their father to handle the situation and gave permission to do whatever was necessary to teach a lesson, well, other than violently beating, although the thought did cross my mind. But then I remembered the demons and that those were not my children.

And what does this all have to do with dimes?

While in Utah a few weeks ago, I watched my brother as he dealt with his children during one of their meltdowns. (Sigh of relief that I'm not alone). I heard him say, "That's one dime." The crying and continued. "That's two dimes." It still continued. Three dimes, four, five all the way to ten before the children took a deep breath and calmed down. Dimes, I though to myself. It's almost as if that word equaled magic somehow. I had to know the secret and what made a dime so powerful.

He told me that the beginning of every month each child gets 100 dimes and every time they display unacceptable behavior or don't do as they are told, they loose a dime. When they loose a dime it goes into mom and dad's jar. The dimes cannot be earned back throughout the month and loosing them is a punishment for bad behavior. However, at the end of the month, whatever dollar amount is left in the child's jar, the parents will double in a cash reward. Therefore, giving each child the potential to earn $20/month for good behavior.

I liked the idea. We all liked the idea and liked it a lot. With the recent tantrums fresh in mind, I was more than anxious to give anything promising a try. Because yelling at yelling accomplishes nothing and I've learned that time and time again. This seemed simple and the evidence was powerful.

So far, dimes are proving to have a little magic in our house as well. The babe (who is no longer a babe) will constantly state, "If {insert whatever sister's name} talks like that then she will LOOSE A DIME! Sometimes they act like they don't care if I take the first dime but then with a second or third one following, a change is made. And it's so nice because instead of arguing or fighting the battle I will never win, all I have to do is calmly repeat "Two dimes, three dimes, four dimes, five dimes" and it's so much better for my soul.

I'm hopeful for the months to come and hope to report that dimes will always ward off or at least temper anymore split personality fits in the future.

Behind Closed Doors

2011-03-20T16:18:00.001-06:00

Being ripe with child the fourth time around is different in its own right. I'm older with less energy and a body that seems to be on the brink of falling apart - or at least feels as if it will some days. I find a new gray hair daily and just pray that it's the pregnancy and not a preview of more to come. I have plenty of activities, both necessary and by choice, that can fill every minute of my day. But, not to loose sight of this great miracle growing within my own womb, I quietly slip away and lock myself in my room to take a moment and savor its sweetness.

I look at my protruding belly and watch anxiously for the next movement that I feel long before anything visible can be seen. Almost as if on cue, I see a ripple - maybe a kick - the ball of a heel or fist followed by something larger and more round. Is that the head? Or the bumb? I can't help but wonder, trying to imagine the position of this little being nestled beneath my skin. My stomach suddenly tightens and I nearly loose my breath - those "false" contractions that keep me grounded and remind me to slow down.

I wonder whether it's a he or a she because the unknown is a new adventure this time around. Will you look like me or your father I want to ask. What will you make of your life here on earth and how will you change mine are just a few questions that race through my mind. Again on cue, another ripple followed by a jolt then a slow wave across my entire abdomen.

And then stillness and silence.

These are the moments of pregnancy that I love, the moments that I miss once their gone, the moments that are shared between me and this child that I will soon be able to meet. Forget the aching back, sore legs, swollen limbs, fatigue mixed with abundant energy, heartburn and everything else that accompanies this womanly journey because these moments behind a locked door are just a glimpse into God's wisdom and a pinhole view into his majestic creations.

Suddenly, the beauty of the moment is interrupted with an image or sound such as this. And I wonder.....

(What happens when it's time to leave Grammie's house)

Will I survive one more?

But, wait, they do turn out like this sometimes, too.


(adorable niece Savannah)

Ready or not, here we come!

Race Day

2011-03-06T21:11:00.000-07:00

For the last two months, we have spent nearly every Monday on the ski hill and last week was the final day -Race Day- where the competitive side comes out in everyone, including and especially the parents. The girls were nervous and Ellie even tried to stay home. That morning, Ava told me that she forgot how to race and couldn't remember anything from the year before. I thought it was cute to see evidence of their nerves mixed with some excitement.

Ellie has participated in the race for two years but since she wasn't in school her time didn't count and she couldn't ever receive a medal or trophy. This year was different and she was really excited at the idea of taking home a trophy.

She raced against 9 other kindergarten girls from Swan Valley and Alta. The course set-up was awful this year and majority of the kids were confused as to where they should go and which waving arms they should follow. It was semi-disastrous and some of the die-hard parents were causing serious grief. Ellie skied her course flawless until the very end when she thought the man at the bottom of the hill directing the other lane where to finish was waving his arms at her. She stopped completely a foot or so before the finish line. We were certain she wouldn't place because of the flub and since so many of the other girls were really fast.

Ava started off strong and cruised down the course at an impressive pace. However, there were eight other girls in her grade and most of them did really well, too. Despite the frigid temperatures and fierce wind, we really enjoyed watching all their hard work pay off. Ava thought since she beat the girl in the other lane that it meant she won overall so I tried to prepare both of them in the event that they didn't place.

Just before the hill closed, they had a big medal ceremony in the lodge to announce the winners. As a parent, I just stood there hoping they wouldn't be disappointed and made sure to let them know they both performed really well and improved so much this year. To our surprise, Ellie took second place and Ava took first. It was so fun to see them get all excited and stand up in front of everyone with their awards.

However, Ellie was a little bummed that she only got a medal and not a trophy like the years before. Ava, on the other hand, kept telling us how she's never gotten first before and how neat it felt.

We were so proud of them and happy to leave the hill for the year on a high note. It's been so much fun to see their progress this year and really watch their confidence bloom. They both proudly wore their medals the following day to school which I suppose there's no hiding they skipped school to go skiing. It's been so worth it, though. It's all about priorities, right?

Another Reason Why I Love Where I Live

2011-03-04T09:15:00.000-07:00

I'm not gonna lie, February and March are the hardest months for me to look on the bright side and find reason to love where I live. The cold grows even more bitter and the grueling wind does nothing to ease the pain as it nips me to the bone and the constant howling hurts my ears just as fingernails scratching on a chalkboard. When temperature reaches 30 degrees, I proclaim a day of warmth and coats are no longer necessary. Funny how just several months earlier the very same digits qualified it a stay.in.your.house.unless.absolutely.necessary.to.do.otherwise kind of a day.

I may live in a small 50,000 population town with many limitations; but, our local ballet studio is nothing close to ordinary. In fact, its as if someone scooped up a New York style ballet academy and tucked it in the heart of our old downtown filled with character, charm and a sense of being in another place and time. It's somewhat magical walking up the old staircase that creeks beneath each step, the smells are not familiar yet strangely they are.

From the inside, I love peering out the windows and seeing my town from a slightly elevated view, a place that suddenly makes everything look better and brighter. Likewise, I love the architecture, the aged building, the cracked walls, and old pipes that constantly leak all winter long. I love the old cinema across the street and the shops that line the street on either end. The cars fill the streets until five o'clock when everything quiets down and the local street goers emerge. I love walking around the corner to the bread store or down a few blocks to the river to feed the ducks. I love the Outdoor Store that's just around the corner and my favorite boutique just a block in the other direction. But most of all, I love the Ballet Society where I've spent a good chunk of my time the last four years for myself and two of my girls.

I love the couple that makes this place their home and their livelihood with a mission to share their passion and love for dance with generations of students. They teach in a way that not only inspires but creates depth and understanding beyond the basic technique or choreography. They teach the details, the why's and treat every student as if they have the most potential. They lead a very structured and disciplined studio where a foundation of principles are set and one concept builds on another until they fit perfectly like a carefully crafted puzzle, a puzzle that increases with complexity as the years go on.
The couple that runs the Ballet Society has more combined experience than most larger cities have to offer and they teach because they love to. I went back a little over four years ago and rediscovered my passion for dance in a new and refined way. They helped nurse my body back from pregnancy #3 in the weeks postpartum and now have convinced my growing belly into a pair of tights and ballet slippers once again. {Yikes...} When I was dancing three days a week, I was in the best shape of my life both mentally and physically.

They don't take students until age 5 because they say anything earlier is just babysitting. Their rates are ridiculously low and the value for our dollar is quite generously in our favor. I love that they teach my girls discipline and structure, but most of all that they challenge their minds and work with their abilities. They push them and encourage growth all while building confidence with praise and satisfaction.

I'm amazed with their patience and determination to find and pull our the dancer in everyone. Ballet is the foundation of all dance and with the proper technique, they can do whatever they want. Even if the girls choose not to dance, they've learned to be poised young ladies and carry themselves with a quiet confidence found only in ballet.

Inside the studio, the walls are lined with fine art images, inspirational sayings, classic art prints and artwork that spans the ages and cultures.

I could go on and on about how much I love it there and how this little part of town has become so ingrained into my being and now into all our lives. I feel lucky to have such an opportunity in our small community and such budding professionals willing to share what they love to do with anyone willing to learn and listen.

Thank-you to the Ballet Society for saving my mind this freezing February 2011.

Mad Woman

2011-02-27T20:23:00.001-07:00

(For my brother Jayson...there you go!)

This past week I've been hit full force with the pregnancy nesting bug, so much that I fear I'm going crazy. With Ava, I was obsessed with sewing, Ellie it was painting and Maggie was cooking. Somehow, I've managed to have them all this time and a few more.

I discovered the most delicious and deadly chocolate cake recipe from a new favorite cookbook. Seriously, I think everyone should own that book along with this cookbook cuz they're both the bomb! I've been grinding my own wheat, making rolls and just today made the most delicious Italian bread from this cookbook. I've baked treats and sent them to the neighbors or taken them with us on our Monday skiing outings for everyone else to eat. I'm becoming a mad woman for sure.

The last few days, I've spent rearranging furniture, moving items from one part of the house to the next, re-accessorizing, fabric shopping for future window treatments that I plan to sew (wish me luck there) and basically turning p-s-y-c-h-o. It's bizarre but I feel like the energizer bunny on mission with no stopping in sight. I want to paint everything and am just trying to convince Jake that it's ok to paint our beautiful alder bathroom vanity cabinets or the locker doors in the mudroom. I envision stenciled walls in my bathroom en lieu of wallpaper, an entirely new do in the girls' bathroom, curtains in my bedroom and newly covered pillows on my bed - we do have eleven to choose from and I'm reminded of this often.

I scrubbed our hardwood floors on hands and knees instead of using my shark just so I could get in between all the cracks and at the same time I decided to scrub the cabinets and wash all the knobs. Next I tackled the bathrooms and taught the babe the joy of scrubbing like mad. She's a toilet washing pro and loves those Clorox wipes. I'm almost to the point of vacuuming twice in one day.

I've taken up yoga religiously but am not quite ready to give up running or my other exercise regimen even though I can barely walk afterward. I have three months to go and am trying to remember to enjoy the alien movements at all hours of the night, the constant need to relieve the excess fluid I've been lugging around, not to mention the few times that a swift kick in the womb in just the right spot has helped me experience what life will be like in my 80's. The ~~leg~~ body cramps have started and just last night I couldn't shake one right on top of my ankle. I hate those suckers.

Pregnancy, a blessing a miracle, one that I've been fortunate to experience four times in my life. It's also the reason I'm going nuts and loosing my mind. Now I'm going to end because I still need to make some cookies and another chocolate cake.

Really, I think I'm crazy?

Double The Fun

2011-02-23T19:41:00.003-07:00

We've certainly had our fair share of sugar and treats this month with holidays and birthdays. I made an extra effort not to overshadow Ellie's birthday with her older sister turning the big 8 this year. I had plans to do so much more but in the end opted for the easy way out and I think she was just as pleased. I'm kind of a scrooge when it comes to toys and kids, meaning I just think the two co-exist way too much and I don't always think more is better. That being said, we really wanted to do something special for Ellie this year. She is our creative little child who loves to color, draw, paint, you name it. We kept her out of the basement all day until that evening to keep it surprise.

(Waiting patiently for the big reveal, opening a few gifts, blowing out her cupcakes)

We put together her very own craft station down in the basement and displayed some the artwork done by all three girls. I'm relieved to finally have a place for all the markers, crayons, glue, scissors, pencils, etc..... There's still a few finishing touches but at least it's somewhat put together. When she first walked down an saw it, she paused and then asked if she could open her other presents.

However, the next morning when she woke up, she came into my room with sleepy eyes and a sugar hangover and asked if she could go and color. When I asked her what she dreamed about she said, "That I colored all day and all night." Later when she came home from school she said, "I told Mrs. Keller all about the basement. I asked her what she said and she replied, "That it's like walking into heaven."

I think birthday #6 went down as a success.

I had plans to do a big friend party for both of the girls and have a movie/popcorn theme. I wanted to make a popcorn cake and make it a big deal but in the end, I figured Ava already had her big day and I was completely exhausted.

Ellie settled for a few friends to watch a movie and play the Wii and I took the easy route with cupcake batch #2. I don't think any more effort on my part would have made a difference anyway.

6 year olds are easy to please.

The perfect birthday = brand new make-up case.
(not gifted by me)

As for me, I will do my best to NOT sneak this one into the garbage like all the others.

Happy Day to you Elle-Belle.

You have been such a delightful child.

The Number 8

2011-02-18T09:48:00.000-07:00

February is a busy month with two of the girls birthdays happening the first 9 days. Since our 3 year old doesn't really understand the concept of time and exactly when July is for her birthday, we decided to add her in the mix as well. One night, after Ellie's bday, she said to Jake while he was tucking her into bed, "Dad, guess what tomorrow is? It's my birthday."

Our first birthday was a big one as Ava turned eight years old and took the plunge in the baptismal waters to become an official member of the church. She's been so excited for the last six months and anticipated just exactly how the events would unfold. She's such a good kid and as her mother I just hope I'm teaching her something of value. Heaven knows she teaches me a much more.

Her baptism was perfect as there were just two little girls from our stake being baptized so it was literally her special day. I spoke at her baptism and it was so fun to see her bright wide eyes staring up at me filled with excitement coupled with a fair amount of nerves. The day was one of those mother-moments that I will never forget.

Since her actually birthday was the night before, Grammie and Grandpa took us all out to Red Robin at her request. She really wanted the balloons and free dessert they give for birthdays. We got home quite late and tried to convince her to wait until the next day to open her gifts but she insisted and reminded us that "she would get more presents tomorrow." Needless to say, she was spoiled. She received new ski clothes (that we actually gave to her several weeks ago), a baptism dress and her very own Scriptures and a few other things.

After her baptism, we had a big celebration that involved good food, friends and lots of family.

A highlight was that Daniel Darcy surprised everyone and drove 10 hours through the night to be there. We were all shocked and it really made Ava feel special. Grandma L. gave her an ant farm and now ants are her new favorite animal. This was actually a relief because Jake has been telling her for years that she could get her own animal (whatever she wanted) when she turned eight. In the last few years, she's informed us that she was going to get just about every single animal possible. I'm relieved that ants will suffice.

One birthday down and we did it all again just a few days later.

Yearly Challenge 2011

2011-02-02T10:07:00.005-07:00

I'm going to pretend, for one moment, that it's still January and that I'm not already behind on announcing my yearly challenge and posting my first entry. I've been going back and forth on whether or not I even want to do one. For some reason, the task seemed a bit daunting. However, I remembered how much I enjoyed the last two that I've done, how much I have learned, and how much fun it is to look back and see my progress and growth.

This year will be a 2-fold challenge and I have opted for monthly vs. weekly in the wake of having another addition on my hands. The first part of this year's challenge is titled Love Where You Live and is an extension of something I started doing last year, finding something that I loved about the area in which I live.

Regretfully, I spent the better part of 2010 plotting my escape and loathing my surroundings completely.

I envisioned taking my family to an unknown place to have an unknown adventure, to escape nature's brutality that was nearly destroying my soul. I envisioned a new culture, new climate, new people, and the very thought of it made me feel like I was restfully sunbathing on a tropical beach. In fact, for the first time in 10 years, I envisioned moving back to the very place I once called home, back to the Beehive State next to the majestic mountains and more pleasant weather.

Then I woke up and realized that I probably wouldn't be content on my "new adventure" because I had to change some things within myself. My solution? To search for something in my surrounding area that I absolutely love, something different for each month that I wouldn't want to live without, something I would miss if I ever left this place that is now my home. I want to take photos and document why I love what I chose. Each month I will be on a journey to "Live each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign {myself} to the influences of each," (Henry David Thoreau).

For January I chose Grand Targhee Ski Resort. I love this area all year round but especially right now. Nestled in the western slopes of the Teton Mountains, Grand Targhee not only provides incredible skiing terrain, but the picturesque views are the kind that stir something within the human soul, making it impossible not to feel the divinity from which they were created. When the clouds slip away and the sun sits high in the clear blue ski, the Teton Peaks shine through in all their grandeur and the panoramic views are endless. It's like sitting on top of the world.

(image stolen from here.)

(View out our car window as we are leaving the resort)

While this resort is still a good hour and 45 minutes from where we live, located in Wyoming and not Idaho, it's the place we spend a good chunk of our winter months. Off and on for the last six years, Jake or I or both have assisted with the Ski Program and been Ski/Boarding instructors. Basically, we teach for an hour and ski for free. Our girls all ski and we look forward to our weekly outings as a family. Not only do I feel fortunate to have such a great hookup and the ability to teach our girls a sport that we love, being able to do in such a exquisite piece of God's country should be enough to make me happy for a lifetime.

And today I am.

So far January has provided all skiing conditions, very typical for this resort. We've had fresh powder, zero visibility, frigid temperatures, wind, rain, snow, hail and thankfully gorgeous bluebird skies.

We even know what it feels like to ski blinded by the thick white fog.

Nature is fascinating and I'm constantly in awe at the different conditions and elements every single day. Just when I think a snow covered tree or wind blown icy sculptures can't be more beautiful, my senses are surprised and I love winter even more.

The girls have already suffered frozen fingers and toes but they suck it up and ski their little hearts out. I especially love when Ellie begs for the BIG lift and tries to squeeze in just one more run before we have to leave. Or when Ava begs to head down the non-groomed trails and calls out to have us watch her "carve." They're both doing especially well this year and we love to see their excitement as they successfully ski down a really steep hill. February will be the babe's turn who is sadly no longer a babe.

Targhee has given us countless memories we will cherish a lifetime, providing a time and a place for our little family to bond and spend time together. In the end, isn't being a family what it's all about? None of this would be possible if we didn't live where we do. Today when look at the thermometer and it reads -12 degrees and the real temperature is even colder with the wind chill, I can smile knowing that it's not forever and that thankfully we can bundle up and enjoy the freezing temperatures together doing something we all enjoy.

Should you ever find yourself in the area, Grand Targhee is skier's paradise and a place everyone should see.

Lucky me, I get to go every single week.

(view from my chairlift)

(Part 2 of my challenge will be posted shortly or maybe not at the rate I'm going).

A Heavy Heart

2011-01-23T07:48:00.001-07:00

There are those moments in life that come without warning and in a instant change us forever. Yesterday, while on a quick trip to Utah, I learned that a childhood friend woke up to find her 20 month little boy suddenly gone from this mortal world. Her world as she knew it - changed - forever and her heart left aching beyond comprehension. I have no words and while seeing the hundreds of messages left upon her facebook wall, I noticed her response to one of the many condolences that read.....

I WILL BE all that God needs me to be even if in the "becoming" my heart breaks. All is well All is well.

I thought of this past summer when sweet little Preslee was taken from her family and the words from Ashley's blog came to my mind, Life can change in an instant and A LIFE can change us forever.

Once again, I don't know why certain people have to deal with such mortal challenges but I do know that this life is about "becoming" all the God wants us to be. And I do know that life is eternal. In honor of little Bennett, I would like to re-post one of my favorite posts by Mandy that I posted with her permission January of 2009. She wrote this while pregnant with this sweet babe and now that I'm sitting those same pregnancy shoes, the words mean so much more.

We love you Wilkinson Family.

If All Else Fails, Make Hair Follicles
by: Amanda Wilkinson

When I was young and single, I would envision the family that I would have and the kind of mother I would be. I would create disciplinary strategies, structured schedules and be baffled (in a way only non-parents are) by mothers whose children seemed "out of control" whatsoever. I dreamt of the active, productive, creative beings that I would bring into this world to nurture and the kind of "Janeen Brady" adventures we'd have. I would be the perfect mother. I had it all figured out.

Sometime later, I found the man of my dreams, tied the knot and immediately (like 9 months and 2 weeks later) started a family. I soon saw that though my goals were worthy, my game plan was quite unrealistic. Each child is a individual - a living, breathing person - with likes and dislikes, quickly formed opinions on certain things (like bedtime and taking medicine), and does not feel any social pressure whatsoever for "polite public conduct" (such as having a bowel explosion in church that oozed all over mommy's dress . . . classy).

Fast forward seven years. Three (and a half) kids and a whole lot of adventure later, I still have the goal of raising active, productive and creative beings. Only my game plan has changed. Dramatically. On some days, I feel rather successful. Other days, I think I was misguided from the beginning and think television (which my children only watch occasionally) is a pretty great alternative.

Consider this. While trying to motivate my children to be active, they often "activate" themselves all over my house: hanging from the staircase railings like monkeys, using our elevated counters as a dancing stage, and playing leapfrog from bed to bed (once resulting in the total annihilation of an antique vanity bench that I inherited as a child . . . it was a sad day).

As for their creative genius? Oh, they have it. In spades. And I have the evidence to prove it: splatter painted glitter glue all over our newly painted playroom, red paint mosaics to accompany the glitter glue job, purple nail polish embellishments in our newly-carpeted Master Suite, eye pencil illustrations on our ivory painted cabinets in the Master Bath, Crayola Marker (thank goodness) accents on their (okay, GRACIE'S) ivory bed, and - the Grand Prize Winner - the emptying of a gallon of ivory paint all over their newly-carpeted bedroom floor (and trailed throughout the upstairs) and all over Gracie's new bed linens and comforter (thank goodness a lot of water and a few hours of major scrubbing took care of most of the job . . . minus the bed linens and comforter).

Luckily, at least thus far, they seem productive. What ever they set their minds to do they accomplish. Whether good or otherwise. They love doing their jobs as long as incentives are involved (just a few pennies contribution to their Disneyland jar and they're thrilled!) and joyously - most nights - do their dinner duty (they still find it exciting to do chores alongside mom and dad . . . pray that lasts). Bonus. In this area, I feel like a winner.

However, on bad days, there are ego-boosting benefits to being pregnant (though just typing that sentence makes me chortle). On the days when the "Hyde" of all your "Jekyll" dreams rears its ugly head and you feel misguided, unrealistic and - frankly - a failure, all you have to do is go to your pregnancy calendar and read "making hair follicles today" and, in an instant, you feel like a miracle worker and someone worthy of the ultimate praise.

So, despite the ways my children may "activate" themselves today or choose to display their creative genius, I can sit back and look at my pregnancy calendar and feel like the "Mother of the Year."

Cheers, friends. Cheers.

So you think I'm fat?

2011-01-16T21:04:00.002-07:00

Tonight my husband just walked in the room to tell me something important then quickly lost all train of thought.

I've got cleavage now - enough to leave a guy speechless and certainly a moment worth documenting.

What did I do to deserve such an honor? Ah the benefits of being ripe with child, with a growing abdomen comes a growth in other places, some are welcomed and some are not.

Which reminds me of a conversation my oldest was having the other day with one of her friends. It went something like this....

Ava: Did you know when moms get pregnant and their bellies get big that their butts get big, too?

Friend: Oh yea, I know (as she's slyly eying my rear).

Ava: (Directed to me) "Look, mom! Your belly pokes out and then it makes your butt poke out too."

Friend: (Nodding in agreement) Yea, it does.

This is where I burned whatever food I was so kindly making for them.  

I tell you it's so nice to have little shadows monitoring my weight gain and growth 15 thousand times a day. Really, I never tire of hearing oh I see a baby bump or your belly is BIG or the baby is really growing or look mom's really preg-A-nant or your getting fat......

Actually, it gets old really fast but I'm enjoying the ride.

PS - Just had the 20 week ultrasound and decided to go out with a bang and keep this one a surprise. Although, we're pretty sure it's girl #4 since A) we seem to make those real well or B) I'm really in for a nice dose of payback during the teenage years. Probably a little of both.

PPS - Pretty sure I look just like this.

Let the skiing begin.....

2011-01-12T09:53:00.000-07:00

I'm having a sort of love/hate relationship with blogging these days. I want to post and document things for posterity but I always seem to find something better and more productive to do. I realize that if I do keep pluggin' along, one day I will look back and be grateful that I took the time and for some reason when I blog it makes me remember to live in the moment more.

I've decided on a challenge for 2011 but am making it a monthly challenge rather than a weekly one - the weekly challenge just about killed me, although I had a lot of fun. I will, hopefully, write more about that shortly. But it has something to do an attitude adjustment, camera skills and writing. I'm kind of excited.

In the meantime, the ski season is upon us and our days on the big white hill have begun. We started teaching last week at Targhee and will continue for the next 6 weeks. Although, I've been swayed to mostly skiing these days, I'm still teaching snowboarding and had an awesome day last week in some fluffy fresh powder. In fact, we enjoyed an entire day sans kiddos and it was fabulous. Of course, I'm being careful and taking it easy - which kinda stinks - but is necessary given my growing abdomen.

Cheers to the winter sports!

Christmas Recap

2011-01-04T14:17:00.001-07:00

This year we packed up and headed to Utah for a Christmas "Clark" style. We were thrilled to be spending the holiday with Jayson, Jules and Spunky Savannah and the one Clark sibling that still remains in Utah. The only complaint I could give is that the grass was green and the snow didn't fall until the day after. But that's just a minor complaint. Christmas Eve was hosted by Ryan and Misty and they did not disappoint. We had enough delicious food to feed a village, watched the kids perform the nativity (of which they took their roles very seriously) and even had a surprise visit from the jolly red-suited man.

Santa even insisted some of the bigger kids plop on his lap. It appears Jayson is very certain in his response to the "what do you want for Christmas" question. I guess your never too old for Christmas which is why he was the first one up (5am) Christmas morning to check out what the fat.old.man.in.red left under the tree. I still think it was a little mean how Santa sent the kids outside to search for Rudolph in the sky then took off out the front door. They never saw Rudolph and were all a bit deflated and cold.

Regardless of age, Christmas morning is always magical and this year was no different. The girls all slept in (thank goodness) and we even had to wake up Maggie because her sisters were growing very inpatient. As they were all ripping into their gifts, Grandpa made sure that we added in the "true meaning" of Christmas by reading the Nativity for the second time.

Savannah loved helping open the first gift until she realized it was hand warmers and not something to eat. She burst into tears and wanted nothing to do with the opened gift.

The girls received some additions to their American Girl Doll Collections and Maggie finally joined the club.

I loved this site of Ellie playing with her new doll and bike. I'm still in awe at these little creations.

I will admit that this year will go down in history as the one and only year I successfully pulled off the biggest surprise for Jake. He certainly becomes more and more picky the older he gets. With the help of his brother, he received new skis and bindings, exactly the ones he wanted in exactly the right size. He had NO IDEA and for the entire month of December, I couldn't believe I actually pulled it off. We waited until all the gifts were opened then my dad and Jayson delivered the goods with a joyful "Ho, Ho, Ho!"

And just because Christmas is not Christmas without Chex Mix. I look forward to making this yummy snack all year long. Thanks to my sweet Grandma Margaret who slaved away for days making batch after batch for all us grandchildren. Christmas certainly did not disappoint and I'm having a hard time taking the decorations down.

Then end of my 52 Creative Things Challenge for 2010

2010-12-31T00:03:00.000-07:00

First of all, I used to own a domain name for this blog {chattydiaries.com} but apparently it expired and opening a "ticket" with google does nothing for way of communicating. Someone else purchased the domain on or near Christmas Day and now it's some lame old site. Therefore, I've gone back to the original blogspot address jakeandnat.blogspot.com and that's where you'll find all this excitement.....c'est moi!

Onto the final weeks of my challenge for 2010.

Week #50 - Cake Pops

I swear I was the last person to stumble upon the site bakerella a few months ago and about died at all the creations. Since then I've been dying to make cake pops and did so for Christmas goodies. Here are the few things I learned:

Cake pops are time consuming and I suggest making them only for special occasions.
It's necessary to reheat the chocolate or else the cakepop will demolish itself.
Don't start dipping at 10pm.
Red Velvet is divine.
One cake makes a TON!
Don't cuss the pops until you taste them the next day.
They are really, really GOOD.

These were really fun to make and I say that now it's been a few weeks! From what I know they were received well and my girls were upset that we weren't keeping them all for ourselves.

Week #51 Sugar Scrub

I've been wanting to do this ever since my friend (you know who you are) share this little secret. Actually, I took one to each of my SIL's for our girls retreat but this time tried a different combination. They make an easy gift and who couldn't use a little sugar and oil to soften the skin.

Week #52 Play Kitchen Makeover

Sometimes I have a hard time deciding what to do for my mother for Christmas. Parents are hard that way because it seems like they have everything and then if they don't have it they usually don't want it. While we were in Utah over Thanksgiving, I decided to resurrect my old kitchen that is now kept in Grammie's playroom. It's hard to tell in this photo but it was in bad shape. There was water damage, lot of filth, missing doors and some wood that need a little gluing. With my handyman on call, this little kitchen found new life.

(Before)

I ended up using all materials I had on hand minus the metallic paint and new doors. My original plan was to paint the doors with magnet paint but I got lazy and just decided to use a little mod podge and fabric. This project was fun and even Jake was excited about the results. The one thing we still need to get it a better sink - for now we settle for an old pan that doesn't really fit.

(After)

It turned out great and now needs the entire playroom painted (Cassidy...hint, hint)!

Alas, I'm finished and successfully stretched myself creatively 52 times this year. I learned so much and found that trying is better than not trying at all. I chose this challenge because I wanted to have a reason to try new things, learn new skills and attempt things that are only in my mind or that I think I cannot do. What I realized is that my mind moves a zillion times faster than the rest of me and sometimes that's enough to drive me crazy. Plus, I'm becoming slightly more comfortable with the term "Crafty Mama" but only slightly.

So thanks to my friend Carly for inspiring me to do these little yearly challenges. I'm already thinking of my new one for 2011 and will share it shortly.

Expanding

2010-12-24T05:00:00.000-07:00

The most exciting creating of all.  Week #49

Enjoy your holidays.

Sillhouettes - week #48.....post edit

2010-12-22T23:58:00.002-07:00

I've been playing around with Silhouettes the last while in preparation for a few Christmas gifts. I've been wanting to do these since last year and finally took the time to figure it out. I added some to pendants but was saddened that the photos bled a little leaving a bluish mark so I'm attempting a different way in hopes they will work out.

Post edit: An example of the finished product done correctly without a blue tint.

(Nevermind the glare from the light, though)

This one I had professionally printed and am still waiting its arrival, crossing my fingers that it looks how I hope it will.

Sadly, this was a necklace that has a bluish tint to it....hopefully I can get it right.

There we go....#48 and four more to go.

A Gifted Bench

2010-12-21T10:23:00.000-07:00

Project for week #47 was actually kind of fun. The project was something that was done at church for the annual mega craft day and since hoards of crafting women all concentrated into a small space scare me, I opted to bring my supplies home. The project was relatively inexpensive and even less for me since I opted out of the vinyl saying on the front of the bench. (I hate vinyl and can't figure out for the life of me why it's popularity sticks around). I had planned on making it for our cabin for a place to sit and put on/take off shoes. However, when I found out who I had for Christmas on my husband's side, I changed my mind and made it as a gift. Sometimes, it's more fun that way.

My sad attempt at before pics with my phone. Supplies consist of an old ammo box from the Army surplus store and 2x4 pieces of wood. A smaller piece of plywood and foam cut to match attached on top to add a cushy top. The fabric and paint I had on hand, which made it even easier.

The finished product turned out great and I think the new owner liked it. I ended up mixing a little brown paint with glaze and rubbed it on the white to give a more rustic aged look. The boxes are quite deep and make a nice storage spot. I really like projects like this and thanks to my live-in handy man, things go quite smoothly.

Wrapping up this year's challenge

2010-12-20T11:51:00.001-07:00

The remaining weeks of my 52 Creative Things Challenge are going to be posted out of order because I'm lazy like that. So for week #46, a Christmas card I created for my brother's family. I took the inspiration from the circle card on the left found at tinyprints.

Our Thanksgiving in Moab

2010-12-07T20:40:00.005-07:00

We were lucky enough this year to escape the sub zero degree temperatures, freezing wind and blizzard storms and head to Moab for Thanksgiving. It couldn't have come at a better time. Every year we talk about taking a vacation for the holiday and eating out but so far it's never happened. Until now. I guess that's what we get for inviting my parents to dinner then having them change plans and invite us to Moab instead. Such a brilliant idea. And although there was a major cold front that spread across the entire country, double digits was a zillion times better then negative windy temps.

Our row of cabins surround the pasture filled with horses

We arrived late at night and really had no idea where we were staying but were in awe when we woke up and looked out our cabin window right at the Colorado River and enormous red cliffs. It was beautiful. We explored before dinner then headed to the Thanksgiving buffet at our Lodge. We even had the best seats in the house.

I tell you there's something wonderful about not spending one minute in the kitchen and zero thoughts of clean up. We were all so happy to have someone else do it for us this year.

Even my dad was so relaxed that he nearly walked out looking more like a biker dude with both ears covered in jewelry. Call it the turkey coma but I actually think it kinda suits the guy.

The girls found a new friend in the basement museum.

Jake had never been to this part of the world and it was fun to watch him soak up the surroundings and stand in awe at everything. It's been a while since I had been there too and just forget how incredibly beautiful this world, especially this state, can really be.

Dead Horse Point is sure a lot safer than I remember when we were kids. There were no rock walls to hold you back from looking over the edge and I reminded my dad that he gave me nightmares as a kid, pretending he was going to fall off the cliff. I even remember one of my brothers jump off to a ledge below while screaming so we would all think he fell. It's really a wonder we all survived. Needless to say, this time we had a tight grip on our children and the few times we let go, we nearly sent my parents into heart failure.

Thanks to my "senior aged" father who had a lifetime pass to all the National Parks, we went to Canyonlands daily to take in the scenery and let our restless legs run. I love that so many people were also doing the same. We debated bring our bikes but decided against it with the temperatures being lower than normal. I was actually bummed we didn't because bikers were everywhere and I was a bit jealous.

On our final day, we left Maggie and my mom back at the cabin and all hiked up to Delicate Arch. It was the highlight for sure. The girls ran around the rocks like lizards and nearly sent Grandpa into Cardiac Arrest a few times. On the way down, Ava even said, "Watch I'm going to freak Grandpa out." The night before we were all working on a 500 piece puzzle of Delicate Arch and when I explained to Ellie during the hike that we were going to see what was in the puzzle, she quickly replied, "Oh we should have brought the box with us so we would know where it is."

We had such a great time and kept wishing we could stay another day. Thanks mom and dad for giving us an unforgettable Thanksgiving.

(We sure look like ants when standing close).

Thank you Moab
We can't wait to return!

Loving Where I Live Because.....

2010-11-18T06:00:00.001-07:00

There is beauty all around.

Birth Prints Revisited

2010-11-16T20:03:00.000-07:00

I've been waiting to post these two projects until they were properly gifted. Two more birth prints for two adorable little boys. I had them both printed on canvas then mounted so thy can stand on their own as well as framed. What I loved most was that the printed version turned out so much better than I expected which isn't always the case.

Week #45

I might add (though I've said it before) that it's a good thing I'm doing this challenge otherwise my postings would few and far between.

Candy Corn Strawberries

2010-11-06T05:00:00.000-06:00

A few weeks ago, I was talking on the phone with my insanely talented SIL, Cassidy, when she kindly shared a brilliant fall treat she drummed up. Chocolate dipped strawberries in colors to look like candy corns. She promised it was really quick and easy then suggested I do some and use it for my Creative Challenge. (It's always nice to have people looking out for me.)

Per her advice, I headed to Michael's for some white chocolate discs and grabbed yellow, orange and white. Really they were so easy and made a yummy treat for the ladies (and ma famille) that I visit each month.

Week #44

Loving Where I Live.....

2010-11-05T09:03:00.000-06:00

I love where I live because my girls get to skip school and do this....

This one was so delighted to be "all by herself."

Cowboys in action = quite a sight.

I think it's safe to say my children are adored.

Roundup 2010

Mother of the Year

2010-10-30T16:30:00.002-06:00

I've never really be that "into" Halloween like, apparently, loads of people are these days. I mean, I did the usual but didn't really go overboard on anything. This year, the girls were so excited for the holiday that I vowed to do a little more. We started by making this haunted gingerbread house one night. Well, actually, the blasted project turned into a 3-day ordeal because the kit came with fondant and all sorts of goodies that had to dry before the next step could be completed.

Probably won't do that again.

Since we have a really killer rock fireplace in our front room I figured it would be simple to add a few spooky cobwebs and make it look like I put forth a much greater deal of effort. Paid off big time when Ellie exclaimed, "This is the best day of my life!" as we were maneuvering the cotton.

Definitely a do again. Especially since I so easily pleased a 5 year old!

And since I found all these really cool things to do, I figured I better have a reason to do them. I told the girls the could invite a "few" friends from school over for a little {spooky} night. Well, a few friends turned into an entire school class full of overly excited little ones. Thankfully, Jake was my other half and without him I would have certainly gone mad. The children were wild and excited on a level I've never seen before. I was ok until from 6:38-6:39 seemed longer than the previous 1 hr 40 minutes. But everyone left exclaiming it was the "best party ever!" I suppose it's easy to please little ones.

Should I ever do this again, it will have to be after a severe car accident where amnesia erases all my memory. We stayed in bed until noon the next day! But damn-it, I better be the mother of the year for this one!

I did it! I've gotten into Halloween and to be honest, I'm kinda ready for the holiday to be over and it hasn't officially arrived. But this year, it's a 3-day celebration. I think it's best being 1 day.

Happy Halloween!

Definitely counts for week #43

Week 42 - and still caught up.

2010-10-27T10:11:00.001-06:00

I wanted to take the girls to Swan Valley all summer and take pictures because there's so many cool, interesting, beautiful places. Unfortunately, we never made it but happened to be up there about a month ago so I decided it was my last chance. I only had a small window where they would cooperate and we were racing against the light. I just gave up trying and snapped what I could. I got myself a new lens with lower aperture and have been trying to play around with different camera settings. Just when I think I've figured things out, my photos tell a different story.

I took this one of the babe and ended up cropping it (right) before having it printed because I loved how it showed her blue eyes and red lips. (She was just starting to get sick) I had it printed on canvas and mounted and have it sitting on a shelf in her room. She's asked several times, "Mom, why did you cut off my eye?" I did catch her carrying it around one day and when I asked her what she was doing, she just said, "I just love it, mom."

To me, I can see both of their personalities so clearly in these photos. One will pose in front of the camera all day long and has been working hard to perfect her "modelish" poses. (Any guesses which one?)

I also took some pictures for a couple friends and have decided on a few things.

I'm not a photographer and don't want to be.
I don't like staging pictures (I could write an entire post about this) I prefer just capturing a moment.
I don't like taking pictures when there are expectations (from myself or others). I just like to be surprised when I happen to get a good shot.

With that said.....Photography was it for week #42.

Things I'm Going to Miss About Summer - part 2 July

2010-10-25T09:29:00.002-06:00

The pleasant weather has left and winter is quickly approaching. I knew this day was coming and thankfully Mother Nature prolonged the inevitable longer than usual, blessing us all with a gentle transition from summer to fall. (But, then again, I'm not sure we even really had a summer at all). We've been enjoying the cool crisp WIND-free air and spending much of our time outside. Alas, the WIND is here and with it the rain and cold. We're just bracing for the first snowfall because it usually happens right before Halloween.

In the meantime, I will reminisce about summer - the one we really didn't have - and document for posterity's sake some of my favorite parts.

{Cousin Time - July}

I love that my girls are old enough to really enjoy their cousins and this year we were able to have some cousin sleepovers and lots of them. Sometimes I feel bad for myself and my children because my side of the family is all scattered about and that's where the bulk of their cousins exist. Thankfully, my family kind of likes each other and we get together often. There are 22 grand-kids now and everyone is multiplying like rabbits (according to my 92 year old Grandfather).

Gracie (aka Ava's twin) came to stay with us. We went on a little hike which turned into severe competition as to who (between she and Ava) could be the leader, walk the fastest, read the next sign the fastest, eat the most snacks, etc.... I almost dumped both of them in the spring along the way.

Gracie is also know as the early bird and cheerfully wakes up at 5am ready to play. Luckily, we found a solution to that problem. She slept peacefully with her "beauty mask" on and did so until about 7am.

We enjoyed a little getaway in Heber with Misty and her kids. It was originally supposed to just be a girls trip (minus the husbands but including the little boys) but this took place right before and the husbands joined us because we were all holding each other a little tighter. The older girls took a 3-day sewing class at my favorite store and made aprons, tote bags and pillow cases. I am in love with Heber and would move there in a second.

On our way back we were lucky enough to catch a few minutes with our European cousins - Mitch and Niall.

We finally met Miss Margaret and she took a liking to Jake right away. He has a way with the ladies

Before heading home, we had to stop for some of this at the most delicious Sushi Place around.

We met up with Taylor and his kids as well as Sicily and baby Sorelle. Sushi was even a hit amongst the little ones.

While we were all eating away, Jayson called and had just arrived in town. One by one, we were all getting together and this time it was just by chance. We stayed one more day in Utah and enjoyed a little of this then headed on our way home.

As I'm looking at our pictures, I'm realizing this is just the beginning. July was a busy month indeed and is to be continued.....

Loving this Time of Year

2010-10-22T08:11:00.000-06:00

One of my favorite things about this time of year is feeling the crunching leaves beneath my feet. September and October have nearly made up for the horrid summer we endured this year. The weather has been so beautiful and perfect. Our transition to fall has been everything is should be, cool crisp air, vibrant colors and little wind (nothing short of a miracle where I live). I've been trying to savor every single moment because it's been a rare and better than we've ever had before.

I'm afraid it's all about to end. According to the Weatherman, by Monday.

So for this week, this year, I love Fall best where I live.

ps- It's roundup and we're heading to the valley of the swans to partake in some cowboy action.

Hooray! I'm still caught up!

2010-10-13T07:00:00.006-06:00

I'm no good at baby gifts for little boys.
No good at all.
I decided to put together a little birth print art - my first attempt.
A baby gift that's long over due.
I think it will look nice in a simple white frame.

{Baby Beau J. Skalski}

Week #41 and on a roll.

Loving where I live part 3

2010-10-12T11:25:00.000-06:00

Yesterday I received the following text message from a cousin that just moved to Pocatello.

"Holy crap is everyone white trash in poky?  Skinny smokin' mullet lovin dudes?"

I couldn't help but laugh because I felt the exact same way when I first moved to Poky 10 years ago.

Today I love where I live because it isn't Pocatello.

***And to my Poky friends, you know I love you and don't hold your physical address against you:)

Merry-Making Mondays and loving where I live

2010-10-04T09:01:00.000-06:00

.....o r t r y i n g t o.

This is the view from my front porch last Thursday evening. The grain field was being cut and it was beautiful. I love my neighborhood, really, really love it. It's tucked between some beautiful farmland and older homes filled with a richness in character and memories. My neighborhood has four entries and is quite large and I have running distances precisely clocked in every direction. There is an older section, a newer section and a section devoted for the retired folks, and a golf course flowing through it all.

While we were sitting on the front porch enjoying the beautiful sunset tucked between clouds of dust, I couldn't help but notice the fall blooming plants in my yard. The best part about having a landscaped yard is watching the blossoms that come with each season and the colors that fall brings.

It doesn't hurt that this last week was filled with the most beautiful weather all year long! Thank-you Sun God's for bring us some sunshine before the world freezes over.

Caught up....at last!

2010-10-01T23:43:00.000-06:00

I'm realizing that I'm the person with too many irons in the fire

(whoever thought of that saying)

but I'm making progress and I like it.

Weeks #37 & 38

Thank-you Mrs. W for collecting so much junk and leaving it in your cabin once ownership was transferred to us and thanks to Jake for not burning these when you almost started a forest fire and for bringing them home (even though I teased you endlessly).
And thank-you garage sale peeps from last year for not wanting these beauties.

Because now two of them look like this and I LOVE.

Oh and thanks to leftover spray paint and random fabric in my stash.

For "C" - to make pumping in public a little more discrete (if you can ever call it that).

Keep feeding that wee one of yours and bring her home.

week #39

Dear Brig - just a few little things I'm trying to get sent your way.

You need bibs now that you're eating real food.

And dang-it, you're getting so flippin' cute!

week #40

Now, I can feel like a rock-star because I'm current on my challenge - at least I think I am.

Merry-Making Mondays

2010-09-27T09:47:00.000-06:00

I've spent the better part of this year complaining about where I live, begging to move, and simply whining like a five year old. I need mountains out my front door and more variety, or so I've thought. Yes, the wind blows constantly and the weather has taken its toll on my weary and weak soul, driving me to the point of madness at times.

While I'm a firm believer that you see what you seek and get what you give, I don't know why it's taking me so long to change my attitude and F O C U S on the goodness of where I live because the goodness is everywhere. I've learned that no matter what we have, we want more or think something different is what we need, when really the answer lies in how we look and what we see.

Therefore, I'm determined to fall in love with where I live and by doing so I'm going to find something {one thing} every week for the rest of the year that I love...... right here in my little town. I'm going to focus on it, photograph it somehow, blog about it and see if by the year's end my attitude has shifted and my heart has grown. I want to love where I live and quit wishing away my time on the things or places I think will bring me joy.

Week #1: The beauty of city and country that exists where I live

I have grown to love the farmlands that are intertwined with established neighborhoods, schools and churches. I love that I can look out my front door at a field of grain or drive by hay fields on my way to and from the store. I love the smell of freshly cut hay and a burning field, seeing neatly stacked square bails and enormous round ones like pictured above. I love the clean lines and neatness of freshly cut fields. I love harvest time where I live and seeing and smelling signs of it everywhere. I love that I can walk across the street to borrow some eggs or sugar yet in every direction of my neighborhood there exists patches of farmland, pastures filled with horses or cows, and evidence of the way things used to be.

I really do love it this time of year and I'm trying to love where I live.

A blog I think every woman should read

2010-09-24T06:04:00.000-06:00

I haven't been reading very many blogs lately unless I'm looking for something specific or wanting to keep tabs on my family. But lately, it hasn't been very much at all. I guess I was a little burned out and only did what I could to keep documenting for my posterity via this here little blog. That being said, I did come across a blog about four months ago that captured my heart in a big and good way. It's not very often that I'm moved by a stranger's writing, story and life to the point of tears and deep reflection. That's how I felt about this blog.

And I think it's a blog every woman should read. Honest.

www.Kellehampton.com

I love everything about this blog: the writing, the photography - oh the photography - the creativity, the humor, the honesty and the list goes on. But what I love most is that when I read her blog, I just wanna suck the goodness - every last drop - out of my life and that means something. A lot, actually.

Happy Friday. Enjoy and start reading with this post.

Things I'm going to miss about summer - part 1 (June recap)

2010-09-23T08:59:00.000-06:00

Summer has all but come and gone and as I welcome Fall with anticipation of what this season brings, I can't help but but sniff a little that the summer months flew by faster than I ever thought they could. While June was a month I'd rather forget due to the late start and the most unpleasant weather that followed, there are still a few things about June that I'm really going to miss.

Ugly yellow t-ball shirts and the excitement and freedom that summer brings

Saggy tush

Sisters that find a new love for each other and green grass that lasted forever

Planting a garden that failed miserably (I would like to forget the failing part all together)

The thrill and excitement of running the Wasatch Back for the second time.

While I wasn't as excited this time around and hardly prepared, I remembered once again that I would run it every year if I could.
Also, being "that" team that counted all the roadkills.

Hours spent in the "jetty" with an entire bottle of bubbles (without my knowing)

while the wind howled ferociously outside.

Double rainbows out my front door and down my street.

June - I may have hated you but you were the beginning of rather quick and memorable summer. I guess hate is too harsh of a word. September is making up for all the curse words you caused to race through my mind and occasionally spill out my mouth. In fact, September is quickly becoming my favorite month this year. I guess I kind of owe it to you.

Because Canning is Creating

2010-09-20T14:26:00.000-06:00

Peaches one week and pears the other.

So my posterity can know

that

I was very domestic

and enjoyed it.

Weeks #35-36

Pom Poms.....and not for Cheerleaders

2010-09-19T13:59:00.000-06:00

Week # 34

I've seen these Pom poms everywhere and finally got around to using the tissue paper I bought months ago. The hanging lanterns are supposed to light up but don't. Guess I can't expect much since they were only a few dollars.

Lady with her head cocked sideways is a piece of Kelly Rae Roberts Art I bought this summer at our girl's retreat. I love, love, love it.